A long time ago, a dear friend gave me this book The Prophet by Khalil Gibran.
It's a book of poems, and I enjoyed it quite a bit when I read it. But that I'm older (and I'd like to think wiser), a lot of this book resonates true.
This year, we are celebrating 9 years of marriage. When we first got married, I guess we were the typical newlyweds, who spent every moment possible with each other. We still spend time together, we still enjoy each other immensily but we also enjoy our times alone. My husband enjoys fishing and riding his motorcycles, I enjoy a good book and lazy afternoons on the couch. I was talking to one of my sisters a few weeks back about our marriage, and she said "that sounds boring".
It couldn't be far from the truth. The other day, a single line came to mind: "Let there be space in your togetherness".
After so many years of marriage, we are comfortable with those spaces, and I believe it's what makes our marriage stronger.
Here is the section of the book on Marriage.
Then Almitra spoke again and said, "And what of Marriage, master?"
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
Outraged
I've neglected this blog for so long, I decided to blog twice today.
I was reading Mandy's blog and had the need to blog about something she mentioned. Thanks Mandy for the inspiration.
Everyone has heard by now about the woman who recently had octuplets. It has been in every newscast since the day she delivered them.
My first reaction was "wow, eight healthy kids, what a blessing". I knew fertility treatments had helped her, and well, regardless of my opinions about them, children are a blessing, regardless of how they came to be.
As the news media has covered this event, more information has come out. She already has 6 other children, all conceived the same way apparently. Not only that, she is unemployed and lives with her parents.
Excuse me a minute while I compose myself.
These are tough times for everyone, specially those of us raising a family. Everyone I know is careful watching every penny spent, making sure their kids have everything they need, saving as much as possible, making ends meet.
Then you hear about someone, who is supposely disabled, with a back injury nonetheless, birthing multiple children at once.
I can tell you from carrying twins, pregnancy can cause quite a number on a healthy back, and I'm talking about carrying just 2 babies. Imagine what eight might do to your back.
A few questions keep coming to mind, how could she afford fertility treatment if she doesn't have a job, and how is she going to pay for the hospital bill for herself and the kids who are still in intensive care?
I guess my answer comes from CBS who interviewed her. Apparently she hopes to make money from her story, as CBS reported
I guess Dave Ramsey has a point when he says people suffer from the "I want" syndrome. "I want a house I know I can't afford but if the bank gives me the money, I'll take it. I want, I want, I want".
So this woman wanted kids she couldn't afford to have, found a doctor who thought this could be a great experiment and would get him recognition in medical journals. Now there are 14 children who will be exploited by their own mother for money.
And yes, I know I'm a Christian and I should not judge others. But I'm also human and I'm outraged by this woman's behavior. So I'm ranting, and I will ask God to forgive me and to forgive her; and to watch over those kids.
I was reading Mandy's blog and had the need to blog about something she mentioned. Thanks Mandy for the inspiration.
Everyone has heard by now about the woman who recently had octuplets. It has been in every newscast since the day she delivered them.
My first reaction was "wow, eight healthy kids, what a blessing". I knew fertility treatments had helped her, and well, regardless of my opinions about them, children are a blessing, regardless of how they came to be.
As the news media has covered this event, more information has come out. She already has 6 other children, all conceived the same way apparently. Not only that, she is unemployed and lives with her parents.
Excuse me a minute while I compose myself.
These are tough times for everyone, specially those of us raising a family. Everyone I know is careful watching every penny spent, making sure their kids have everything they need, saving as much as possible, making ends meet.
Then you hear about someone, who is supposely disabled, with a back injury nonetheless, birthing multiple children at once.
I can tell you from carrying twins, pregnancy can cause quite a number on a healthy back, and I'm talking about carrying just 2 babies. Imagine what eight might do to your back.
A few questions keep coming to mind, how could she afford fertility treatment if she doesn't have a job, and how is she going to pay for the hospital bill for herself and the kids who are still in intensive care?
I guess my answer comes from CBS who interviewed her. Apparently she hopes to make money from her story, as CBS reported
I guess Dave Ramsey has a point when he says people suffer from the "I want" syndrome. "I want a house I know I can't afford but if the bank gives me the money, I'll take it. I want, I want, I want".
So this woman wanted kids she couldn't afford to have, found a doctor who thought this could be a great experiment and would get him recognition in medical journals. Now there are 14 children who will be exploited by their own mother for money.
And yes, I know I'm a Christian and I should not judge others. But I'm also human and I'm outraged by this woman's behavior. So I'm ranting, and I will ask God to forgive me and to forgive her; and to watch over those kids.
Thankful
It has been a while since I blogged. I get caught in all the hustle of life, always running from here to there, tending to everyone, and rarely taking time to relax and just think.
I came home around 7:30 Tuesday night. I seldom get home that late, so as I walked out of my car, I glanced overhead and saw the most beautiful sky. The stars were out in full glory, the air was cold, and it made them look even brighter.
I stood outside for a minute, so I could stare at them. I thought about the many nights I sat outside as a child, staring at them, daydreaming, chitchatting with my sister about what we wanted to be when we grew up, our dreams, our aspirations.
I stood there in awe, and was thankful for the gift of nature. I very seldom take the time to just say thanks for the air, the sun, the water, the stars. I go about my busy day and never spend a moment thinking about what a wonderful gift I've been given.
A few weeks back, I talked to the sunday school kids about prayer. Many of them shared with me what they pray about: their families, their friends, a sick relative. We talked about the different things we may do when we pray, how we praise God for his kindness, how sometimes we ask for something like health for a sick aunt, and how we also give thanks for the blessings we receive. One of them said he gives thanks for nature.
Today, I am thankful for nature.
I came home around 7:30 Tuesday night. I seldom get home that late, so as I walked out of my car, I glanced overhead and saw the most beautiful sky. The stars were out in full glory, the air was cold, and it made them look even brighter.
I stood outside for a minute, so I could stare at them. I thought about the many nights I sat outside as a child, staring at them, daydreaming, chitchatting with my sister about what we wanted to be when we grew up, our dreams, our aspirations.
I stood there in awe, and was thankful for the gift of nature. I very seldom take the time to just say thanks for the air, the sun, the water, the stars. I go about my busy day and never spend a moment thinking about what a wonderful gift I've been given.
A few weeks back, I talked to the sunday school kids about prayer. Many of them shared with me what they pray about: their families, their friends, a sick relative. We talked about the different things we may do when we pray, how we praise God for his kindness, how sometimes we ask for something like health for a sick aunt, and how we also give thanks for the blessings we receive. One of them said he gives thanks for nature.
Today, I am thankful for nature.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Battle in my brain
I started my watercolor painting class Tuesday. Funny how something as simple as painting can cause quite a turmoil in this brain of mine.
You see, painting isn't something I would normally do. The last time I painted anything or even did a drawing I was in elementary school. That's how long it's been since I've used that part of my brain.
I figured this class would help me unlock my artistic talent. Everyone has it, right? (just nod and go along with me on this one).
Unlocking my inner Van Gogh turned out to be a lot harder than finding the solution to an engineering problem, or working a differential equations problem. And yes, differential equations is an actual class that yours truly took in college.
I arrived at Millsaps early so I could find the location and a parking space. I got out of the car and hurried into the building, carrying along the huge 18" by 24" pad, my purse, and the supplies. It was quite a comical sight. I managed to get into the building without knocking the wind out of a poor student and without too many people laughing at me.
The teacher is one of those people who inspires you to do your best. Very nice, and very encouraging, just what I needed. She set up a bunch of things on a table for us to replicate. Here is where the battle began.
I'm an engineer, and I analyze everything, including how to replicate a metal can and a rubber ball on my pad. I kept watching the people in the class happily drawing, while I struggled trying to figure out the right angle, making sure the distance between the objects was precise. You get the idea.
I was beginning to get frustrated when the teacher (who probably noticed my eraser had been put to good use in the last 5 minutes) said "we all see things differently, how boring would this world be if we all drew the same thing the exact same way".
That was my "aha!" moment, my epiphany. Unlike most of the class, painting isn't something I normally do. I haven't taken other classes, I didn't take art in college. The way I see a simple metal can is completely different from everyone else's, and that's perfectly fine.
I finally began to relax and started painting. I felt like a kid with a new box of crayons, ready to create my own masterpiece. I started to have fun.
I finished my painting last night, and as I looked at the finished product I realized it reflected who I am. Isn't that what art suppose to be? Shouldn't it reflect the way the artists saw the subject?
Anyone with any bit of artistic flare would probably see all the flaws in the picture. I see myself in those metals cans, and rubber balls. But I also saw something new, I dared myself to think outside the box, to mix colors that I would not normally put together and to even color "outside the lines". I dared myself to try something new and I stepped outside my comfort zone.
I'm looking forward to the rest of the classes, and see how my paintings progress as I become more comfortable with that other side of me. In the meantime, I will keep reminding myself it is okay "to color outside the lines. "
You see, painting isn't something I would normally do. The last time I painted anything or even did a drawing I was in elementary school. That's how long it's been since I've used that part of my brain.
I figured this class would help me unlock my artistic talent. Everyone has it, right? (just nod and go along with me on this one).
Unlocking my inner Van Gogh turned out to be a lot harder than finding the solution to an engineering problem, or working a differential equations problem. And yes, differential equations is an actual class that yours truly took in college.
I arrived at Millsaps early so I could find the location and a parking space. I got out of the car and hurried into the building, carrying along the huge 18" by 24" pad, my purse, and the supplies. It was quite a comical sight. I managed to get into the building without knocking the wind out of a poor student and without too many people laughing at me.
The teacher is one of those people who inspires you to do your best. Very nice, and very encouraging, just what I needed. She set up a bunch of things on a table for us to replicate. Here is where the battle began.
I'm an engineer, and I analyze everything, including how to replicate a metal can and a rubber ball on my pad. I kept watching the people in the class happily drawing, while I struggled trying to figure out the right angle, making sure the distance between the objects was precise. You get the idea.
I was beginning to get frustrated when the teacher (who probably noticed my eraser had been put to good use in the last 5 minutes) said "we all see things differently, how boring would this world be if we all drew the same thing the exact same way".
That was my "aha!" moment, my epiphany. Unlike most of the class, painting isn't something I normally do. I haven't taken other classes, I didn't take art in college. The way I see a simple metal can is completely different from everyone else's, and that's perfectly fine.
I finally began to relax and started painting. I felt like a kid with a new box of crayons, ready to create my own masterpiece. I started to have fun.
I finished my painting last night, and as I looked at the finished product I realized it reflected who I am. Isn't that what art suppose to be? Shouldn't it reflect the way the artists saw the subject?
Anyone with any bit of artistic flare would probably see all the flaws in the picture. I see myself in those metals cans, and rubber balls. But I also saw something new, I dared myself to think outside the box, to mix colors that I would not normally put together and to even color "outside the lines". I dared myself to try something new and I stepped outside my comfort zone.
I'm looking forward to the rest of the classes, and see how my paintings progress as I become more comfortable with that other side of me. In the meantime, I will keep reminding myself it is okay "to color outside the lines. "
Monday, January 26, 2009
Random things about me
I've seen several of my friends doing this on Facebook. I'm still trying to figure Facebook out, so I'm going to blog about it instead.
25 Random things about me.
1. I have never broken a bone.
2. I began wearing glasses when I was in 6th grade.
3. I hate mushrooms. Same goes for peanut butter.
4. I was a cheerleader in HS.
5. I graduated 3rd in my senior class.
6. I've been to Niagara Falls during the winter. Amazing!
7. I've lived in 3 countries (so far!): Panama, Costa Rica, USA
8. I don't know how to swim.
9. I collect elephant figurines.
10. Growing up, I wanted to be either an astronaut or a lawyer.
11. I was a very good orator in elementary school. Won a lot of competitions.
12. I don't know how to swim
13. I was a RA at a freshman dorm at Ole Miss. I loved it.
14. First time I went to Washington DC, I drove. Longest trip ever.
15. I danced for several years with a group that did traditional Panamanian dances. I miss it so much, even now.
16. My first trip to Canada (Toronto), I was in a car accident, on New Year's Eve. Quite a memorable trip.
17. I've been in one beauty pagent, was 2nd runner up.
18. I've been camping only once, right after I got married.
19. I love to cook. I love trying out new recipes or inventing new ones.
20. I love to watch soccer matches.
21. I played softball and basketball in Jr. High
22. I don't know how to play any instruments. I hope to learn piano before I die.
23. My first trip abroad was in 6th grade. Our class went to San Jose, Costa Rica for a week.
24. I would like to travel to Europe for my 40th birthday.
25. If I could have a chat with one person today, it would be my cousin Jose who passed away 8 yrs ago. I miss him every day.
25 Random things about me.
1. I have never broken a bone.
2. I began wearing glasses when I was in 6th grade.
3. I hate mushrooms. Same goes for peanut butter.
4. I was a cheerleader in HS.
5. I graduated 3rd in my senior class.
6. I've been to Niagara Falls during the winter. Amazing!
7. I've lived in 3 countries (so far!): Panama, Costa Rica, USA
8. I don't know how to swim.
9. I collect elephant figurines.
10. Growing up, I wanted to be either an astronaut or a lawyer.
11. I was a very good orator in elementary school. Won a lot of competitions.
12. I don't know how to swim
13. I was a RA at a freshman dorm at Ole Miss. I loved it.
14. First time I went to Washington DC, I drove. Longest trip ever.
15. I danced for several years with a group that did traditional Panamanian dances. I miss it so much, even now.
16. My first trip to Canada (Toronto), I was in a car accident, on New Year's Eve. Quite a memorable trip.
17. I've been in one beauty pagent, was 2nd runner up.
18. I've been camping only once, right after I got married.
19. I love to cook. I love trying out new recipes or inventing new ones.
20. I love to watch soccer matches.
21. I played softball and basketball in Jr. High
22. I don't know how to play any instruments. I hope to learn piano before I die.
23. My first trip abroad was in 6th grade. Our class went to San Jose, Costa Rica for a week.
24. I would like to travel to Europe for my 40th birthday.
25. If I could have a chat with one person today, it would be my cousin Jose who passed away 8 yrs ago. I miss him every day.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Mission Statement
Until last year, I had never heard of a personal mission statement. I knew organizations and companies had them, but it never occurred to me that people could have them to. It wasn't until I was attending the "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" seminar that I heard about it.
Part of the seminar required that we start writing ours. There were a set of exercises that would get you into the right frame of mind, basically asking you how you would want others to remember you.
After the class, I finally sat down and start writing mine. I wanted it to be simple, easy to remember. Some people have long paragraphs, others have one word. It's personal, it should reflect what you want your life to be.
I never shared mine with anyone. Until now. The 35th anniversary of my birth seemed like the perfect time to remind myself of what I want my life to be.
My Personal Mission Statement
I will love with all my being
I will lead by example
I will live without regrets
I will learn at every opportunity
I will leave a legacy in the lives of my children
Some people don't really like to celebrate birthdays. I'm not one of those people. I am thankful for every moment of my life, even the tough ones. They taught me invaluable lessons that I can now pass on to my kids. I'm thankful for the rough spots because they made me value my blessings even more.
I don't ever want to take this life for granted, or the moments I get to share with those I love. I don't want to get caught in the superficial, worrying about what I don't have. I want to enjoy life as it is, with its ups and downs.
I hope that one day, when I'm no longer here, I will live on in the heart of my kids and in the lessons I taught them. Hopefully they will pass them on to their kids, just as my mom passed down those lessons my grandfather taught her.
Part of the seminar required that we start writing ours. There were a set of exercises that would get you into the right frame of mind, basically asking you how you would want others to remember you.
After the class, I finally sat down and start writing mine. I wanted it to be simple, easy to remember. Some people have long paragraphs, others have one word. It's personal, it should reflect what you want your life to be.
I never shared mine with anyone. Until now. The 35th anniversary of my birth seemed like the perfect time to remind myself of what I want my life to be.
My Personal Mission Statement
I will love with all my being
I will lead by example
I will live without regrets
I will learn at every opportunity
I will leave a legacy in the lives of my children
Some people don't really like to celebrate birthdays. I'm not one of those people. I am thankful for every moment of my life, even the tough ones. They taught me invaluable lessons that I can now pass on to my kids. I'm thankful for the rough spots because they made me value my blessings even more.
I don't ever want to take this life for granted, or the moments I get to share with those I love. I don't want to get caught in the superficial, worrying about what I don't have. I want to enjoy life as it is, with its ups and downs.
I hope that one day, when I'm no longer here, I will live on in the heart of my kids and in the lessons I taught them. Hopefully they will pass them on to their kids, just as my mom passed down those lessons my grandfather taught her.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Faith
On my way to church this morning, I realized how my childhood has truly shaped my spiritual life.
I am "cradle Catholic", born into a very large Catholic family, raised in a country where the majority of the people were of the same faith. It would be easy to assume I know no other form of worship.
By the time I was born, my father no longer attended the Catholic church. He was searching, looking for the "something" he felt was missing from our faith. Even though he no longer considered himself to be Catholic, we were enrolled in Catholic school and participated in all the activities and took all the Sacraments of the Church.
Dad kept searching, and with him, we would attend other denominations. I was five when I realized my dad didn't worship like we did. It was my first year in Catholic school. At night and during the weekends, Dorothy would come to our house and talk to my parents about her faith. She was a Jehovah's witness. She looked like a teacher, with her hair on a bun, her skirt and white blouse, and always so well mannered. She told all about her beliefs, and we listened and respected her faith.
Dad didn't find what he was looking for there either. Then came the Mormons, one couple in particular has remained on my mind. One of them was from Guatemala, the other one was American. They knew we were Catholic, and they respected that. They told us about their church, and even taught us hymns, one in particular I can still sing: "Blessings, count your blessings and you will see, how many more blessings you are yet to receive".
There were other denominations: Adventists, Evangelicals, Pentecostals, Episcopalian, Lutheran... we probably covered most of the Christian denominations before Dad started to head down the Buddhist path where he is today.
I didn't realize until this morning, how lucky I was to have my childhood. I learned at a very early age about respecting other people's beliefs and ways of worship. I learned that although our services are different, we worship the same God, and we all want the same thing.
After I became an adult, it came time for me to also begin my search. I didn't want to worship like my mother and family did simply because that's what I was taught. I didn't want to follow my dad's path either. I had to find my own way. So my search began.
Mine brought me back to my beginning, it brought me to the faith of my grandmother, great grandmother, and my entire family. It is more than the faith of my ancestors, it is my faith now.
If I hadn't had a father who encouraged me to think outside my comfort zone, I probably wouldn't have been tolerant of others who didn't worship like me. I learn about tolerance and respect simply by allowing others to share their faith with me.
From time to time, someone will say something demeaning about Catholics in front of me without realizing I am "one of those people". Most of the time, my first reaction is to become defensive, but thankfully that passes very quickly. Most of the time, the person making the comment does not know anything about my faith. If only they would ask...
I look at my family now, and see the same opportunity for my kids to learn tolerance and respect towards others. My inlaws are Southern Baptists, my father is a Buddhist, we are Catholic. I hope one day they will realize how blessed they are to be surrounded and be a part of such a diverse family, just as I did this morning on my way to church.
I am "cradle Catholic", born into a very large Catholic family, raised in a country where the majority of the people were of the same faith. It would be easy to assume I know no other form of worship.
By the time I was born, my father no longer attended the Catholic church. He was searching, looking for the "something" he felt was missing from our faith. Even though he no longer considered himself to be Catholic, we were enrolled in Catholic school and participated in all the activities and took all the Sacraments of the Church.
Dad kept searching, and with him, we would attend other denominations. I was five when I realized my dad didn't worship like we did. It was my first year in Catholic school. At night and during the weekends, Dorothy would come to our house and talk to my parents about her faith. She was a Jehovah's witness. She looked like a teacher, with her hair on a bun, her skirt and white blouse, and always so well mannered. She told all about her beliefs, and we listened and respected her faith.
Dad didn't find what he was looking for there either. Then came the Mormons, one couple in particular has remained on my mind. One of them was from Guatemala, the other one was American. They knew we were Catholic, and they respected that. They told us about their church, and even taught us hymns, one in particular I can still sing: "Blessings, count your blessings and you will see, how many more blessings you are yet to receive".
There were other denominations: Adventists, Evangelicals, Pentecostals, Episcopalian, Lutheran... we probably covered most of the Christian denominations before Dad started to head down the Buddhist path where he is today.
I didn't realize until this morning, how lucky I was to have my childhood. I learned at a very early age about respecting other people's beliefs and ways of worship. I learned that although our services are different, we worship the same God, and we all want the same thing.
After I became an adult, it came time for me to also begin my search. I didn't want to worship like my mother and family did simply because that's what I was taught. I didn't want to follow my dad's path either. I had to find my own way. So my search began.
Mine brought me back to my beginning, it brought me to the faith of my grandmother, great grandmother, and my entire family. It is more than the faith of my ancestors, it is my faith now.
If I hadn't had a father who encouraged me to think outside my comfort zone, I probably wouldn't have been tolerant of others who didn't worship like me. I learn about tolerance and respect simply by allowing others to share their faith with me.
From time to time, someone will say something demeaning about Catholics in front of me without realizing I am "one of those people". Most of the time, my first reaction is to become defensive, but thankfully that passes very quickly. Most of the time, the person making the comment does not know anything about my faith. If only they would ask...
I look at my family now, and see the same opportunity for my kids to learn tolerance and respect towards others. My inlaws are Southern Baptists, my father is a Buddhist, we are Catholic. I hope one day they will realize how blessed they are to be surrounded and be a part of such a diverse family, just as I did this morning on my way to church.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Just call me Bette
Deanna had this quiz in her blog, so I figured it was perfect for a Friday blog. Just call me Bette
How to Get Along with Me
What I Like About Being a Bette
What's Hard About Being a Bette
Bettes as Children Often
Bettes as Parents
Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...
You Are a Bette!
You are a Bette -- "I must be strong"
Bettes are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.
How to Get Along with Me
- * Stand up for yourself... and me.
- * Be confident, strong, and direct.
- * Don't gossip about me or betray my trust.
- * Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side.
- * Give me space to be alone.
- * Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me.
- * I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's a personal attack.
- * When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just the way I am.
What I Like About Being a Bette
- * being independent and self-reliant
- * being able to take charge and meet challenges head on
- * being courageous, straightforward, and honest
- * getting all the enjoyment I can out of life
- * supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
- * upholding just causes
What's Hard About Being a Bette
- * overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend to
- * being restless and impatient with others' incompetence
- * sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
- * never forgetting injuries or injustices
- * putting too much pressure on myself
- * getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when things don't go right
Bettes as Children Often
- * are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
- * are sometimes loners
- * seize control so they won't be controlled
- * figure out others' weaknesses
- * attack verbally or physically when provoked
- * take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings
Bettes as Parents
- * are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
- * are sometimes overprotective
- * can be demanding, controlling, and rigid
Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Back in First Grade
All of a sudden, I've found myself back in first grade. I'm not too happy about it either. Don't get me wrong, I want to help my daughter do her best in school and to have fun learning new things. But I need a manual just to get through every week of school.
Has school gotten harder as the years go by? Is it more demanding now that I'm a mom, or have I just forgotten what it was like?
Part of the curriculum for this year includes the accelerated reader program. Those of you with older kids probably already know about this. It is a noble program because it gets the children interested in reading, and it keeps them reading. What I don't like it's the point system and the competition factor.
The school has an "honor" award to reward those kids who have achieved the goal for the year. This year the goal is 20 pts, that's probably 40 books because each book is worth half a point.
The kids have to take a test on the books they read, and if they pass, the score counts toward the total points.
Sounds simple enough, right? What's wrong with wanting the kids to read and become interested in reading?
I wish the focus was more on reading than on getting points, or reading approved books. We have several good books that are not on "the list" that are probably going to be put aside until summer simply because we have to get through the AR books. Then there is the test part. Where is the fun of reading a book if you know there will be a test afterwards?
I hated history while in school because of all the reading. I didn't care to memorize dates, history was, well, history. Until I became older and started reading about it for fun. It became something I wanted to know about. I didn't have to remember dates, I could just enjoy the books now.
I don't want Candace to become so focused on reading to pass a test that she will miss out on the joy of reading. I watch her read books because she "has to" that may not interest her; only because they are "approved" on someone's list.
I've found myself creating spreadsheets and cataloging books according to their AR status, and picking out of the "good" ones for her to read. I read them myself so I can ask her questions and make sure she understood what she read, so she can take the test.
How do I balance all this out so she can read what she likes and still have time to read the required books? I'm not sure. For now, we are going along with the required books. Hopefully she will begin to enjoy reading the books, and forget about the points. I hope.
Has school gotten harder as the years go by? Is it more demanding now that I'm a mom, or have I just forgotten what it was like?
Part of the curriculum for this year includes the accelerated reader program. Those of you with older kids probably already know about this. It is a noble program because it gets the children interested in reading, and it keeps them reading. What I don't like it's the point system and the competition factor.
The school has an "honor" award to reward those kids who have achieved the goal for the year. This year the goal is 20 pts, that's probably 40 books because each book is worth half a point.
The kids have to take a test on the books they read, and if they pass, the score counts toward the total points.
Sounds simple enough, right? What's wrong with wanting the kids to read and become interested in reading?
I wish the focus was more on reading than on getting points, or reading approved books. We have several good books that are not on "the list" that are probably going to be put aside until summer simply because we have to get through the AR books. Then there is the test part. Where is the fun of reading a book if you know there will be a test afterwards?
I hated history while in school because of all the reading. I didn't care to memorize dates, history was, well, history. Until I became older and started reading about it for fun. It became something I wanted to know about. I didn't have to remember dates, I could just enjoy the books now.
I don't want Candace to become so focused on reading to pass a test that she will miss out on the joy of reading. I watch her read books because she "has to" that may not interest her; only because they are "approved" on someone's list.
I've found myself creating spreadsheets and cataloging books according to their AR status, and picking out of the "good" ones for her to read. I read them myself so I can ask her questions and make sure she understood what she read, so she can take the test.
How do I balance all this out so she can read what she likes and still have time to read the required books? I'm not sure. For now, we are going along with the required books. Hopefully she will begin to enjoy reading the books, and forget about the points. I hope.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Helping the children
There have been a lot of commercials and even an hour long fundraising commercial about children in other countries. The poorest of the poor.
Last weekend, as I was tackling the mountain of clothes that needed to be folded, my daughter came in the room crying. At first, I thought maybe her brothers had decided to team up against her, and had hurt her. I asked what was wrong.
Still crying, she tells me she just saw a commercial on TV showing all these poor children all over the world, who have nothing to eat, some don't even have any parents. She said it was so sad it made her cry.
I held back the tears. She asked me to call the number on TV so we could send them some money to help these kids. I told her we would, but I wanted to make sure these were good people who truly help the kids, so I would do some research and together we would pick who to send the money to.
I was touched. She is only 7. I wonder how many adults watched the same show, and flip to another channel so they wouldn't have to see what being poor in another country looks like. I wonder how many felt nothing when they see these commercials.
There are tons of different groups who help many different groups of people, here and abroad. Whether you want to help with literacy, hunger relief, support research efforts, the list is endless. I personally support a few that are close to my heart, maybe because someone in my family suffers from a particular disorder, or because I have witnessed first hand the work that group does.
My daughter has not forgotten about the promise I made or the children she saw on TV. She asked again last night when we are going to pick a group to send our money too. I am happy to see she understands and appreciates the blessings God has bestowed upon our family. Perhaps it is more than just the commercial on TV.
Part of the reason I wanted her to go to Panama was that I wanted her to see how other people lived. How I onced lived. I wanted her to see first hand what it meant to be poor, to struggle, and still to wake up every morning, thankful to see another day.
We didn't have to travel far during our trip to Panama to see poverty. We didn't even have to look for it, as my own family is poor. You could call us the working poor, I guess. They may not have all the luxuries my daughter has, they have their basic needs and their love for life remains intact.
I am proud to see that even at her young age, she is able to appreciate how fortunate she is. Even more so, I'm proud that she wants to reach out to those children who are suffering and help them out.
I'm now tasked with finding the right group to sponsor. I have many different ideas, perhaps I should just pick a family from Panama and send them the money directly, perhaps I should contact a group in Panama who does this type of work. I'm weighing all the possibilities.
In the meantime, I am thankful that my daughter has reminded me how fortunate I am, and how it is now my responsibility to give back to those who need my help.
Last weekend, as I was tackling the mountain of clothes that needed to be folded, my daughter came in the room crying. At first, I thought maybe her brothers had decided to team up against her, and had hurt her. I asked what was wrong.
Still crying, she tells me she just saw a commercial on TV showing all these poor children all over the world, who have nothing to eat, some don't even have any parents. She said it was so sad it made her cry.
I held back the tears. She asked me to call the number on TV so we could send them some money to help these kids. I told her we would, but I wanted to make sure these were good people who truly help the kids, so I would do some research and together we would pick who to send the money to.
I was touched. She is only 7. I wonder how many adults watched the same show, and flip to another channel so they wouldn't have to see what being poor in another country looks like. I wonder how many felt nothing when they see these commercials.
There are tons of different groups who help many different groups of people, here and abroad. Whether you want to help with literacy, hunger relief, support research efforts, the list is endless. I personally support a few that are close to my heart, maybe because someone in my family suffers from a particular disorder, or because I have witnessed first hand the work that group does.
My daughter has not forgotten about the promise I made or the children she saw on TV. She asked again last night when we are going to pick a group to send our money too. I am happy to see she understands and appreciates the blessings God has bestowed upon our family. Perhaps it is more than just the commercial on TV.
Part of the reason I wanted her to go to Panama was that I wanted her to see how other people lived. How I onced lived. I wanted her to see first hand what it meant to be poor, to struggle, and still to wake up every morning, thankful to see another day.
We didn't have to travel far during our trip to Panama to see poverty. We didn't even have to look for it, as my own family is poor. You could call us the working poor, I guess. They may not have all the luxuries my daughter has, they have their basic needs and their love for life remains intact.
I am proud to see that even at her young age, she is able to appreciate how fortunate she is. Even more so, I'm proud that she wants to reach out to those children who are suffering and help them out.
I'm now tasked with finding the right group to sponsor. I have many different ideas, perhaps I should just pick a family from Panama and send them the money directly, perhaps I should contact a group in Panama who does this type of work. I'm weighing all the possibilities.
In the meantime, I am thankful that my daughter has reminded me how fortunate I am, and how it is now my responsibility to give back to those who need my help.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Math
I've been hitting a "blogger block", so decided to google ideas to spice up my blog (you know it's bad when you get bored with your own blog!). I found a blog with many different topics. They seemed silly at first, then I thought, yeah, why not. I chose to write about my worst subject.
The minute I tell people I'm an engineer, they immediately blur out "wow, you must be very smart" or "you must really like math". Well, I'm not smarter than the average person, and my IQ would prove it.
So imagine their surprise when I tell them, my worst subject, the one I hated the most throughout my entire educational experience, was math.
I vividly remember one night in Elementary school. I think I was in second grade at the time, and we were learning long division. My sister Joyce had volunteered to help me (she is way smarter!), and show me an easy way to do it.
We sat at the dinner table, and she started to show me how to work the problem and gave me a couple of problems to solve. As I became more and more frustrated, I began to cry, and as I began to cry, I became angry with myself because I was crying. You get the idea. I was a sobbing mess. I could not understand how anyone could think learning long division would be beneficial to anyone. Had they ever heard of calculators? Joyce patiently kept waiting for me to stop sobbing, and finally I "got it".
After it was all over, I recalled making a promise to my mother, I was never going to study anything that required me to do math. I was going to choose a career as far away from math as possible.
Little did I know I would end up breaking that promise.
Perhaps I am a masochist, I don't really know. I liked school from the very first day my parents dropped me off in kindergarten class. I liked making good grades, other subjects came easy for me. I wasn't about to let math ruin my grades, so I made it a point to study harder for that subject than for any others. I wanted to maintain good grades, and by golly, math would not get the best of me.
So it began, my love/hate relationship with math.
My senior year in high school came and it was time to think about college, and possible majors. I really liked chemistry, more than any other subject, but I didn't want to work in a lab. As fate would have it, my teacher at the time took our class to a conference about women in science and engineering. That's where I had the most brilliant idea of my life: I would study chemical engineering. It involved chemistry (which I loved ) and math (which I loathed). Besides, the salaries were appealing, why not give it a shot?
So I embarked into a long journey with my worst enemy. We had our rough times, but I would not let "it" get the best of me, or get in the way of achieving my goal. I would not quit because of it. I have scar battles ( and several dead brain cells) but I won the war. I finished my degree in engineering.
In second thought, maybe I am a masochist. As if one degree in engineering wasn't enough, I went back for more. A master's in engineering. Maybe hate turned to love in the end?
The minute I tell people I'm an engineer, they immediately blur out "wow, you must be very smart" or "you must really like math". Well, I'm not smarter than the average person, and my IQ would prove it.
So imagine their surprise when I tell them, my worst subject, the one I hated the most throughout my entire educational experience, was math.
I vividly remember one night in Elementary school. I think I was in second grade at the time, and we were learning long division. My sister Joyce had volunteered to help me (she is way smarter!), and show me an easy way to do it.
We sat at the dinner table, and she started to show me how to work the problem and gave me a couple of problems to solve. As I became more and more frustrated, I began to cry, and as I began to cry, I became angry with myself because I was crying. You get the idea. I was a sobbing mess. I could not understand how anyone could think learning long division would be beneficial to anyone. Had they ever heard of calculators? Joyce patiently kept waiting for me to stop sobbing, and finally I "got it".
After it was all over, I recalled making a promise to my mother, I was never going to study anything that required me to do math. I was going to choose a career as far away from math as possible.
Little did I know I would end up breaking that promise.
Perhaps I am a masochist, I don't really know. I liked school from the very first day my parents dropped me off in kindergarten class. I liked making good grades, other subjects came easy for me. I wasn't about to let math ruin my grades, so I made it a point to study harder for that subject than for any others. I wanted to maintain good grades, and by golly, math would not get the best of me.
So it began, my love/hate relationship with math.
My senior year in high school came and it was time to think about college, and possible majors. I really liked chemistry, more than any other subject, but I didn't want to work in a lab. As fate would have it, my teacher at the time took our class to a conference about women in science and engineering. That's where I had the most brilliant idea of my life: I would study chemical engineering. It involved chemistry (which I loved ) and math (which I loathed). Besides, the salaries were appealing, why not give it a shot?
So I embarked into a long journey with my worst enemy. We had our rough times, but I would not let "it" get the best of me, or get in the way of achieving my goal. I would not quit because of it. I have scar battles ( and several dead brain cells) but I won the war. I finished my degree in engineering.
In second thought, maybe I am a masochist. As if one degree in engineering wasn't enough, I went back for more. A master's in engineering. Maybe hate turned to love in the end?
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
On my way
I'm a believer one must state their intentions out loud in order to make them real. So here is one on my list of intentions for this year,
I am on my way to a healthier me.
There, now it is real.
I have known (for a while now) that I have put on a few more pounds than I'd like to admit. I have been in denial, mostly because I figured as long as I fit in my clothes, I really don't care about weight all that much.
Then reality came calling. In a few more days, I will be turning 35. I'm no longer the college kid who survived engineering school on Milky Way bars and Coca Cola. I cannot longer eat the way I used to and be healthy.
That's not to say I'm not healthy. My cholesterol, blood sugar, and other things are within the "normal acceptable" range. But those are just numbers. I know I can do better when it comes to my nutrition.
So with the help of a group of coworkers, I am determined to adopt a healthier lifestyle.
This won't be easy. Giving up things that you really, really like; and adding things to your diet that you really, really could do without, is never easier.
One of the people in the group asked me why would I join this group of people, where the majority are trying to lose weight, since I have no weight to lose? In reality, I could afford to lose a few pounds. But it is not about the pounds for me.
I need more energy. As my children get older, my life gets more hectic and more demanding. I work outside the house fulltime and my "other job" begins when I walk in the door. I also need to know I'm setting a good example for my kids. They will do what I do, and not what I say.
So in order to achieve my goal to a healthier lifestyle, I decided to make myself a list of things I will start to do to get me on my way.
1) I will drink one glass of milk every day.
Seems simple enough but I do not like milk. I have had issues with lactose intolerance and since then, simply cannot bring myself to drink it. But I need the calcium, my bones need it, and well, it just has to be done.
2) I will eat more vegetables.
I am not a veggie eater. I will eat a green salad, I will try zuchinni, and even squash, but the rest, I rather not put on my plate. Give me a side of potatoes instead!
3) I will limit my caffeine intake to one cup of coffee per day.
This is a big one. I love my coffee, gotta have my coffee every morning. It's all fine unless you drink too much of it. With a family history of osteoporosis, I really need to limit mine, and get more calcium in my diet.
4) I will exercise at least 30 min 3 times a week
I trained for a marathon in 2007. I survived running 22 miles in the MS summer. I woke up at 3 AM so I could join my running buddies for our long runs at the Rez. So why is it so hard now to get up 30 minutes earlier and workout? Because I've become lazy. There is no excuse.
5) I will pack my lunch at least 4 times a week.
With Keifer's and Basil's a block from me, it is very easy to stop bringing lunch.
There are more, I'm sure I will think of more as I go along this journey. If I lose weight in the process, fine. If I don't, fine too. I just want to feel good when I get out of bed in the morning, energized, and ready to start my day.
I am on my way to a healthier me.
There, now it is real.
I have known (for a while now) that I have put on a few more pounds than I'd like to admit. I have been in denial, mostly because I figured as long as I fit in my clothes, I really don't care about weight all that much.
Then reality came calling. In a few more days, I will be turning 35. I'm no longer the college kid who survived engineering school on Milky Way bars and Coca Cola. I cannot longer eat the way I used to and be healthy.
That's not to say I'm not healthy. My cholesterol, blood sugar, and other things are within the "normal acceptable" range. But those are just numbers. I know I can do better when it comes to my nutrition.
So with the help of a group of coworkers, I am determined to adopt a healthier lifestyle.
This won't be easy. Giving up things that you really, really like; and adding things to your diet that you really, really could do without, is never easier.
One of the people in the group asked me why would I join this group of people, where the majority are trying to lose weight, since I have no weight to lose? In reality, I could afford to lose a few pounds. But it is not about the pounds for me.
I need more energy. As my children get older, my life gets more hectic and more demanding. I work outside the house fulltime and my "other job" begins when I walk in the door. I also need to know I'm setting a good example for my kids. They will do what I do, and not what I say.
So in order to achieve my goal to a healthier lifestyle, I decided to make myself a list of things I will start to do to get me on my way.
1) I will drink one glass of milk every day.
Seems simple enough but I do not like milk. I have had issues with lactose intolerance and since then, simply cannot bring myself to drink it. But I need the calcium, my bones need it, and well, it just has to be done.
2) I will eat more vegetables.
I am not a veggie eater. I will eat a green salad, I will try zuchinni, and even squash, but the rest, I rather not put on my plate. Give me a side of potatoes instead!
3) I will limit my caffeine intake to one cup of coffee per day.
This is a big one. I love my coffee, gotta have my coffee every morning. It's all fine unless you drink too much of it. With a family history of osteoporosis, I really need to limit mine, and get more calcium in my diet.
4) I will exercise at least 30 min 3 times a week
I trained for a marathon in 2007. I survived running 22 miles in the MS summer. I woke up at 3 AM so I could join my running buddies for our long runs at the Rez. So why is it so hard now to get up 30 minutes earlier and workout? Because I've become lazy. There is no excuse.
5) I will pack my lunch at least 4 times a week.
With Keifer's and Basil's a block from me, it is very easy to stop bringing lunch.
There are more, I'm sure I will think of more as I go along this journey. If I lose weight in the process, fine. If I don't, fine too. I just want to feel good when I get out of bed in the morning, energized, and ready to start my day.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Happy 2009!
It is a new year, but the old left a lot of lessons to be learned.
I got this from a friend, rather than email it to everyone I know, I'll just put it here.
1) What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
I started teaching Sunday school to a group of 3rd-4th graders. They are such amazing kids and they have helped me increase my faith.
2) Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't make any for last year. This year, the main resolution I have is to have fun, laugh often, and step outside my comfort zone.
3) Did anyone close to you give birth?
My friend Terri gave birth in August, then my friend Mari gave birth in time for Christmas. and Mandy, she had Ethan this year!
4) Did anyone close to you die?
Some of my husband's family died but we weren't very close to them.
5) What countries did you visit?
Panama
6) What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
More alone time with my husband
7) What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Our anniversary (May 20), kids' birthdays (May 1 and September 12).
8) What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I visited my father after 10 years, and my kids had a chance to meet him.
9) What was your biggest failure?
No failures, a few disappointments
10) Did you suffer illness or injury?
Illness, some. No injuries.
11) What was the best thing you bought?
Dual screen DVD player for the car. It was a lifesaver during our trip to Panama.
12) Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My husband's, who made the decision to be a stay at home dad.
13) Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
One person comes to mind, but karma will catch up with her eventually.
14) Where did most of your money go?
To pay all debts (finally debt free!) and medical expenses from Cade's ER visits.
15) What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Signing up for watercolor painting class (starting in 3 weeks!)
16) What song will always remind you of 2008?
Jesus Loves me, because it was the first one Candace learn to play in the piano.
17) Compared to this time last year, are you:- happier or sadder? happier.- thinner or fatter? fatter- richer or poorer? moneywise, the same, but richer in the things that truly count.
18) What do you wish you'd done more of?
Taken time to step outside my comfort zone.
19) What do you wish you'd done less of?
Get frustrated when things don't go the way I planned.
20) Did you fall in love in 2008?over and over again
21) What was your favorite TV program?
Brothers & Sisters.
22) Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't hate anyone. I may dislike some people, but I don't hate anyone.
23) What was the best book you read?
Strange Sons by Portia Iversen. It's about her autistic son, her journey with him, another mother she meets with a child very similar to hers. Very powerful.
24) What was your greatest musical discovery?
High School Musical songs. ha.
25) What did you want and get?
a day of pampering
26) What did you want and not get?
the lottery
27) What was your favorite film of this year?
Sex and the City movie, because that's the only one I saw this year.
28) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I worked, turned 34
29) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Same as 2007, shorter hair, if it fits, I wear it.
30) What kept you sane?
my husband (while simultaneously driving me insane some days).
31) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Brad Pitt
32) What political issue stirred you the most?
The whole thing, people questioning the candidates ability only because of gender or race.
33) Who did you miss?
My family back home.
34) Who was the best new person you met?
My daughter's piano teacher. She is 94 years old, and still has her mind intact. She loves music and loves kids, and her passion keeps her going. She is such an example.
35) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
Take the time to laugh, forgive, and enjoy life.
36) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
“Tell everybody I'm on my way, and loving every step I take...with the sun shining down, yes I'm on my way, I can't keep the smile off my face"
I got this from a friend, rather than email it to everyone I know, I'll just put it here.
1) What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
I started teaching Sunday school to a group of 3rd-4th graders. They are such amazing kids and they have helped me increase my faith.
2) Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't make any for last year. This year, the main resolution I have is to have fun, laugh often, and step outside my comfort zone.
3) Did anyone close to you give birth?
My friend Terri gave birth in August, then my friend Mari gave birth in time for Christmas. and Mandy, she had Ethan this year!
4) Did anyone close to you die?
Some of my husband's family died but we weren't very close to them.
5) What countries did you visit?
Panama
6) What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
More alone time with my husband
7) What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Our anniversary (May 20), kids' birthdays (May 1 and September 12).
8) What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I visited my father after 10 years, and my kids had a chance to meet him.
9) What was your biggest failure?
No failures, a few disappointments
10) Did you suffer illness or injury?
Illness, some. No injuries.
11) What was the best thing you bought?
Dual screen DVD player for the car. It was a lifesaver during our trip to Panama.
12) Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My husband's, who made the decision to be a stay at home dad.
13) Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
One person comes to mind, but karma will catch up with her eventually.
14) Where did most of your money go?
To pay all debts (finally debt free!) and medical expenses from Cade's ER visits.
15) What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Signing up for watercolor painting class (starting in 3 weeks!)
16) What song will always remind you of 2008?
Jesus Loves me, because it was the first one Candace learn to play in the piano.
17) Compared to this time last year, are you:- happier or sadder? happier.- thinner or fatter? fatter- richer or poorer? moneywise, the same, but richer in the things that truly count.
18) What do you wish you'd done more of?
Taken time to step outside my comfort zone.
19) What do you wish you'd done less of?
Get frustrated when things don't go the way I planned.
20) Did you fall in love in 2008?over and over again
21) What was your favorite TV program?
Brothers & Sisters.
22) Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't hate anyone. I may dislike some people, but I don't hate anyone.
23) What was the best book you read?
Strange Sons by Portia Iversen. It's about her autistic son, her journey with him, another mother she meets with a child very similar to hers. Very powerful.
24) What was your greatest musical discovery?
High School Musical songs. ha.
25) What did you want and get?
a day of pampering
26) What did you want and not get?
the lottery
27) What was your favorite film of this year?
Sex and the City movie, because that's the only one I saw this year.
28) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I worked, turned 34
29) How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Same as 2007, shorter hair, if it fits, I wear it.
30) What kept you sane?
my husband (while simultaneously driving me insane some days).
31) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Brad Pitt
32) What political issue stirred you the most?
The whole thing, people questioning the candidates ability only because of gender or race.
33) Who did you miss?
My family back home.
34) Who was the best new person you met?
My daughter's piano teacher. She is 94 years old, and still has her mind intact. She loves music and loves kids, and her passion keeps her going. She is such an example.
35) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
Take the time to laugh, forgive, and enjoy life.
36) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
“Tell everybody I'm on my way, and loving every step I take...with the sun shining down, yes I'm on my way, I can't keep the smile off my face"
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Reminder
The holiday season has begun for us, but not without its share of drama. But I guess in the midst of it all, we have been reminded again of what is important.
It isn't about the gifts, the food, the obligations we have to entertain other. It is about love, commitment, family.
We woke up Christmas day as we had many other Christmases. The kids were thrilled to see what Santa had left under our tree, and ready to put it all to good use. Grandparents came over to have breakfast with us, and I placed a call to my mom, who was late for our celebration.
She had been sick all of the night before, and was not feeling well. We weren't quite sure what was wrong with her, but she was not doing well. Mom isn't the type to succumb to illness, she will go to work if she can, even when ill. For her to stay in bed is a huge ordeal and a sign of things not going well.
I headed over to her house, along with 2 of my sisters, and we did our best to make her comfortable. The rest of the days have been spent at doctor's offices, and the ER. We finally have a diagnosis, and a course of treatment. She will need surgery but at least we found the cause of all her discomfort.
None of us really minded that our Christmas was unusual. We did what was right and took care of our mother's need. We cancelled our get together and hope to reschedule it later so we can exchange gifts. There have been no complaints, not even from the kids who don't quite understand what's happening.
In a way, this year reminded us of what's truly important. It is not about having the perfect decorations, perfect food, perfectly set table. It's about family, about taking care of each, about love.
It isn't about the gifts, the food, the obligations we have to entertain other. It is about love, commitment, family.
We woke up Christmas day as we had many other Christmases. The kids were thrilled to see what Santa had left under our tree, and ready to put it all to good use. Grandparents came over to have breakfast with us, and I placed a call to my mom, who was late for our celebration.
She had been sick all of the night before, and was not feeling well. We weren't quite sure what was wrong with her, but she was not doing well. Mom isn't the type to succumb to illness, she will go to work if she can, even when ill. For her to stay in bed is a huge ordeal and a sign of things not going well.
I headed over to her house, along with 2 of my sisters, and we did our best to make her comfortable. The rest of the days have been spent at doctor's offices, and the ER. We finally have a diagnosis, and a course of treatment. She will need surgery but at least we found the cause of all her discomfort.
None of us really minded that our Christmas was unusual. We did what was right and took care of our mother's need. We cancelled our get together and hope to reschedule it later so we can exchange gifts. There have been no complaints, not even from the kids who don't quite understand what's happening.
In a way, this year reminded us of what's truly important. It is not about having the perfect decorations, perfect food, perfectly set table. It's about family, about taking care of each, about love.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Nochebuena
Tomorrow is Nochebuena, Christmas Eve. Wow. This month flew by and Christmas was here before I knew it.
Nochebuena was probably my favorite day of the whole season when I was a kid. The anticipation, the excitement, the food. It was almost as if the air smelled like Christmas. I miss that. I wish I could take my family back to Panama for Christmas, so they could see how I celebrated growing up. One day soon...
I miss my home this time of the year, every year since I moved here. I miss the sound of villancicos (carols), the smell of the food being prepared, the festive atmosphere that just cannot be replicated, no matter how much I try.
This year, I will try to replicate a tiny bit of my Navidad in my home, for my children to experience: in the food, the christmas carols, the anticipation. Maybe one year soon, they'll get to experience an authentic Panamanian Christmas
Nochebuena was probably my favorite day of the whole season when I was a kid. The anticipation, the excitement, the food. It was almost as if the air smelled like Christmas. I miss that. I wish I could take my family back to Panama for Christmas, so they could see how I celebrated growing up. One day soon...
I miss my home this time of the year, every year since I moved here. I miss the sound of villancicos (carols), the smell of the food being prepared, the festive atmosphere that just cannot be replicated, no matter how much I try.
This year, I will try to replicate a tiny bit of my Navidad in my home, for my children to experience: in the food, the christmas carols, the anticipation. Maybe one year soon, they'll get to experience an authentic Panamanian Christmas
Friday, December 19, 2008
The Christmas Season
I was cleaning the kitchen last night, when my daughter came in and sadly said she will be so sad when Christmas is over. I asked her what was the reason behind her sadness, and she said that once Christmas day is over, then Christmas will be over too.
I love moments like those when I can tell her about my life as a child, when I was her age, and have her undivided attention.
So I began to tell her about our Christmas season. I'm Catholic, and growing up in a country where the majority of the people were also Catholic meant our holidays were heavily centered around their Christian meaning. Yes, there were presents and Christmas trees, but we were reminded every step of the way, whether at home or at school, of the real meaning of the holiday.
My Christmas celebration has never ended on Christmas day. My tree doesn't come down, I keep everything as it is until January 6. That's when my Christmas season ends. Growing up, I didn't really know the reason behind keeping the decorations up so long. Everyone else did it, and so did we. It was what we did.
As I've gotten older, I have learned the reason why we did that. Our church celebrates the Christmas season from Dec 25th until January 6. I guess it is simple if you think about it. The story of salvation didn't end with the birth of the Savior, it is just the beginning. There were other things that happened after his birth and during his infancy that were also important and we conmemorate those too. It all ends with the Epiphany, or the day we celebrate the visit from the Magi, the three Wise men.
I explained all this to her in terms she could understand. Regardless of how your worship, Christmas doesn't have to end on Christmas day. The message of Christmas, the giving of unselfish love that God showed us, doesn't end that day, and we shouldn't stop celebrating it just because our decorations are no longer on display.
She seemed to be satisfied with the answer. Who doesn't want to continue to celebrate Christmas a bit longer? I just hope our decorations survive until then. My sons seem to think they need to redecorate every day. They keep moving ornaments around, and rearranging our Nativity scene. Let's home we have decorations left until the Epiphany.
Merry Christmas!
I love moments like those when I can tell her about my life as a child, when I was her age, and have her undivided attention.
So I began to tell her about our Christmas season. I'm Catholic, and growing up in a country where the majority of the people were also Catholic meant our holidays were heavily centered around their Christian meaning. Yes, there were presents and Christmas trees, but we were reminded every step of the way, whether at home or at school, of the real meaning of the holiday.
My Christmas celebration has never ended on Christmas day. My tree doesn't come down, I keep everything as it is until January 6. That's when my Christmas season ends. Growing up, I didn't really know the reason behind keeping the decorations up so long. Everyone else did it, and so did we. It was what we did.
As I've gotten older, I have learned the reason why we did that. Our church celebrates the Christmas season from Dec 25th until January 6. I guess it is simple if you think about it. The story of salvation didn't end with the birth of the Savior, it is just the beginning. There were other things that happened after his birth and during his infancy that were also important and we conmemorate those too. It all ends with the Epiphany, or the day we celebrate the visit from the Magi, the three Wise men.
I explained all this to her in terms she could understand. Regardless of how your worship, Christmas doesn't have to end on Christmas day. The message of Christmas, the giving of unselfish love that God showed us, doesn't end that day, and we shouldn't stop celebrating it just because our decorations are no longer on display.
She seemed to be satisfied with the answer. Who doesn't want to continue to celebrate Christmas a bit longer? I just hope our decorations survive until then. My sons seem to think they need to redecorate every day. They keep moving ornaments around, and rearranging our Nativity scene. Let's home we have decorations left until the Epiphany.
Merry Christmas!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Memories
It's funny how the simplest of things can bring up a mountain of memories. After I put the twins to bed, I started wrapping some Christmas gifts that need to make their way to a friend across the country. It was then that a flood of memories came to me.
I had my first job at the age of 14, wrapping Christmas gifts at a store back in my hometown. My cousin, who was a bit older than me, was working there for the holidays, and got me the job. I was so excited because I had the chance to make my own money and spend it in whatever I wanted.
At the time, there was not a mall in my hometown. The majority of the stores were on one street, lined up on both sides. The stores would all have big speakers right outside, playing Christmas music and trying to lure people into their stores. The stores are not air conditioned, not that it would matter because, in order to deal with the crowd, the doors remain open.
December is the beginning of the hot season in Panama, very little rain, and lots of sun. The gift wrapping area was outside, in front of the store, right on the sidewalk. There was no shade to cover us when the hot afternoon sun was in full force.
I worked the entire month in the heat, and never even noticed. Since the gift wrapping was free, almost everyone took advantage of it, and as the day got nearer, the crowd of people got larger and larger. I wrapped gifts until 11 PM on Christmas Eve that day, and walked home with my cousin (I lived about 5 minutes walk from the store) shortly after.
I remember how proud I was when I received my paycheck. I can't remember the exact amount but it couldn't have been much. Back in those days, minimum wage was $5.60 per day.
It was hard work, but I was happy I was able to do for myself.
A lot has changed since then, I've had many other jobs too. I still remember that job with fondness. It taught me the value of hardwork, no matter what job you are doing. It also taught me how valuable an education would be.
Now I wrap gifts for those that I love, and thank the heavens for the lessons I learned back then.
I had my first job at the age of 14, wrapping Christmas gifts at a store back in my hometown. My cousin, who was a bit older than me, was working there for the holidays, and got me the job. I was so excited because I had the chance to make my own money and spend it in whatever I wanted.
At the time, there was not a mall in my hometown. The majority of the stores were on one street, lined up on both sides. The stores would all have big speakers right outside, playing Christmas music and trying to lure people into their stores. The stores are not air conditioned, not that it would matter because, in order to deal with the crowd, the doors remain open.
December is the beginning of the hot season in Panama, very little rain, and lots of sun. The gift wrapping area was outside, in front of the store, right on the sidewalk. There was no shade to cover us when the hot afternoon sun was in full force.
I worked the entire month in the heat, and never even noticed. Since the gift wrapping was free, almost everyone took advantage of it, and as the day got nearer, the crowd of people got larger and larger. I wrapped gifts until 11 PM on Christmas Eve that day, and walked home with my cousin (I lived about 5 minutes walk from the store) shortly after.
I remember how proud I was when I received my paycheck. I can't remember the exact amount but it couldn't have been much. Back in those days, minimum wage was $5.60 per day.
It was hard work, but I was happy I was able to do for myself.
A lot has changed since then, I've had many other jobs too. I still remember that job with fondness. It taught me the value of hardwork, no matter what job you are doing. It also taught me how valuable an education would be.
Now I wrap gifts for those that I love, and thank the heavens for the lessons I learned back then.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
The Question
To-do or not-to-do, that is the question. Or at least the subject of today's rambling.
I recently suscribed to Real Simple magazine. I had bought one at the store, loved it, and ended up buying a suscription from a friend's son, they were selling suscriptions as a fundraiser.
Anyway, I received the new one yesterday, the official Jan 09 issue. I was anxiously waiting to see what new ideas I could incorporate into my not-really-simple life. This issue actually centered around to-do lists.
I used to keep to-do lists, that's how I survived engineering schools. There were design reports, lab reports, homeworks, tests, more reports that needed to be turned in on time. I had to keep a list so I would know what needed to get done next. As my life became more hectic, my lists got longer and longer until they were no longer manageable. I stopped making them.
I can get things done without one, and my life would be less hectic if I kept a list, but they just don't work for me. I've taken time management classes that praise list making as the best thing ever invented. I just cannot keep one. That's not to say I don't have lists. I keep lists of projects, reports that need to be reviewed, these are "master" lists, not daily lists.
I attended the "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" seminar back in July and loved the whole thing. I even tried to apply the habits to my life and was doing really well until I went on vacation. You can't plan your days while on vacation. Habit 3 is First Things First. All about prioritizing and making lists, and deciding what should come first. It all sounds great, unfortunately once my priority list is set, I will very likely get a phone call from the boss, telling me a new project has moved up to the top of the list, and the list will no longer be valid. Back to square one.
I love the end of the year, not only because Christmas is my favorite holiday, but because the end of the year is near. All those things I promised myself I would do at the beginning of the year, that list of "resolutions" , I can toss it all away and start fresh once January 1 rolls around.
So, rather than trying to plan the rest of the year, I've decided to give the whole planning/prioritizing/to-do list another try after the holidays. If nothing else, this can be part of the whole "New Year resolution" list. After all, I may need something to "toss away" by this time next year.
I recently suscribed to Real Simple magazine. I had bought one at the store, loved it, and ended up buying a suscription from a friend's son, they were selling suscriptions as a fundraiser.
Anyway, I received the new one yesterday, the official Jan 09 issue. I was anxiously waiting to see what new ideas I could incorporate into my not-really-simple life. This issue actually centered around to-do lists.
I used to keep to-do lists, that's how I survived engineering schools. There were design reports, lab reports, homeworks, tests, more reports that needed to be turned in on time. I had to keep a list so I would know what needed to get done next. As my life became more hectic, my lists got longer and longer until they were no longer manageable. I stopped making them.
I can get things done without one, and my life would be less hectic if I kept a list, but they just don't work for me. I've taken time management classes that praise list making as the best thing ever invented. I just cannot keep one. That's not to say I don't have lists. I keep lists of projects, reports that need to be reviewed, these are "master" lists, not daily lists.
I attended the "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" seminar back in July and loved the whole thing. I even tried to apply the habits to my life and was doing really well until I went on vacation. You can't plan your days while on vacation. Habit 3 is First Things First. All about prioritizing and making lists, and deciding what should come first. It all sounds great, unfortunately once my priority list is set, I will very likely get a phone call from the boss, telling me a new project has moved up to the top of the list, and the list will no longer be valid. Back to square one.
I love the end of the year, not only because Christmas is my favorite holiday, but because the end of the year is near. All those things I promised myself I would do at the beginning of the year, that list of "resolutions" , I can toss it all away and start fresh once January 1 rolls around.
So, rather than trying to plan the rest of the year, I've decided to give the whole planning/prioritizing/to-do list another try after the holidays. If nothing else, this can be part of the whole "New Year resolution" list. After all, I may need something to "toss away" by this time next year.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Adventure at the mall
I decided to venture out of the house with all three of the kids yesterday. I'm pretty certain my husband thought I had lost my mind. My friend Veronica was very quick to point out how "brave" I was to go to the mall with not just one but three kids in tow.
I kept telling myself I could handle this. This isn't international travel, it is just a trip to Northpark. How bad could it be?
We arrived at Northpark and I unloaded the double stroller. I told all the kids what behavior I was expecting from them and the consequences they would face if they misbehaved. There was nothing but silence in the backseat of the car as I started to unload them, one by one.
First stop was the food court. Every time my daughter and I head out together we have lunch either at McAlister's or Chick Fil A. Neither of these have a branch near our house, so it is a special treat. We ordered her lunch from McAlister's and got a table. The boys quickly decided they didn't need the stroller, and sat at the table. For a few minutes, I debated with myself. Do I wait for Candace to be finished with her food before I go order some Chick Fil A for the twins, do I leave the twins at the table with her, do I take the twins with me, do I take them all with me?
Decisions, decisions. Candace has been trained when it comes to strangers and what to do. Besides, the table was near enough I could see her while ordering food for the twins. So I took the boys with me, we ordered while watching her, and came back to the table. First obstacle had been conquered.
They got back in the stroller and we headed to find Santa Claus. Everyone was excited to see him, including me. I was daydreaming of the money I would spend ordering pictures with Santa. I didn't even notice the stares that met us everywhere we went, we were going to see Santa!
We arrived, and Cade decided he was having nothing to do with the white-bearded man. He wouldn't even look at him, much less get close. I couldn't even get the other two in there, because this kid was screaming at the sight of Santa.
So we left. He calmed down, we did some window shopping, tried to do some real shopping but they kept insisting in helping me. Thanks but I'm tired of putting things back on the racks. We did manage to get an ornament for our tree and an outfit for Candace. They had a great time, we ate cotton candy and they didn't even noticed the stares.
What's with the stares anyway? I get that they are twins, and they will get attention but these days, with fertility treatments and such, multiples are a lot more common. It seems people can't help themselves. Thankfully, they don't notice yet the unwanted attention they receive. I keep telling myself people stare because they are just too cute to go unnoticed!
People sometimes ask me how I do it. I don't have an answer for that. How does any mom do it? I don't think I'm "special" because I have twins, I'm just a mom like any other. Yes, I had to juggle feeding two babies at once, double the amount of diapers, bottles, and clothes. I had to learn to remain calm when both of them were screaming at once, and figure out how to juggle time with Candace so she wouldn't feel neglected.
But all moms juggle their share of challenges. They all manage. I'm not special. I am just a mom
I kept telling myself I could handle this. This isn't international travel, it is just a trip to Northpark. How bad could it be?
We arrived at Northpark and I unloaded the double stroller. I told all the kids what behavior I was expecting from them and the consequences they would face if they misbehaved. There was nothing but silence in the backseat of the car as I started to unload them, one by one.
First stop was the food court. Every time my daughter and I head out together we have lunch either at McAlister's or Chick Fil A. Neither of these have a branch near our house, so it is a special treat. We ordered her lunch from McAlister's and got a table. The boys quickly decided they didn't need the stroller, and sat at the table. For a few minutes, I debated with myself. Do I wait for Candace to be finished with her food before I go order some Chick Fil A for the twins, do I leave the twins at the table with her, do I take the twins with me, do I take them all with me?
Decisions, decisions. Candace has been trained when it comes to strangers and what to do. Besides, the table was near enough I could see her while ordering food for the twins. So I took the boys with me, we ordered while watching her, and came back to the table. First obstacle had been conquered.
They got back in the stroller and we headed to find Santa Claus. Everyone was excited to see him, including me. I was daydreaming of the money I would spend ordering pictures with Santa. I didn't even notice the stares that met us everywhere we went, we were going to see Santa!
We arrived, and Cade decided he was having nothing to do with the white-bearded man. He wouldn't even look at him, much less get close. I couldn't even get the other two in there, because this kid was screaming at the sight of Santa.
So we left. He calmed down, we did some window shopping, tried to do some real shopping but they kept insisting in helping me. Thanks but I'm tired of putting things back on the racks. We did manage to get an ornament for our tree and an outfit for Candace. They had a great time, we ate cotton candy and they didn't even noticed the stares.
What's with the stares anyway? I get that they are twins, and they will get attention but these days, with fertility treatments and such, multiples are a lot more common. It seems people can't help themselves. Thankfully, they don't notice yet the unwanted attention they receive. I keep telling myself people stare because they are just too cute to go unnoticed!
People sometimes ask me how I do it. I don't have an answer for that. How does any mom do it? I don't think I'm "special" because I have twins, I'm just a mom like any other. Yes, I had to juggle feeding two babies at once, double the amount of diapers, bottles, and clothes. I had to learn to remain calm when both of them were screaming at once, and figure out how to juggle time with Candace so she wouldn't feel neglected.
But all moms juggle their share of challenges. They all manage. I'm not special. I am just a mom
Friday, December 5, 2008
Christmas traditions
At work, we have an internal newsletter that features different employees every month, and depending on the time of the year, different recipes, ideas, traditions.
For the December newsletter they asked that we submit our traditional New Year's celebrations. We have people from all over the world here so it should be interesting to see what everyone does for New Years.
This time of the year has always been my favorite. As a child, I remember how exciting it was to decorate the house for Christmas. One year, our entire neighborhood decorated the street with lights, and we made sure our house was decorated to match.
Christmas Eve is a big deal back in Panama. There is Midnight Mass, and most families attend mass together, to celebrate the birth of Christ. Mass usually starts around 11:00 PM and ends by midnight. Afterwards everyone heads home, to celebrate. There is food, and neighbors go to each others homes to say Feliz Navidad. The kids get to stay up late, and of course, no presents are "delivered" until after everyone is sleep.
I guess you can say we like to party back home because New Years is a big deal too. There is more food, music, our entire neighborhood would become a huge street party. At midnight, everyone goes outside to wish each other a Happy New Year.
I miss the holidays back in Panama. I miss welcoming our neighbors to the house, sharing a bit of food and happy wishes with them, I miss attending Midnight Mass at the Cathedral, I miss home.
But new traditions are emerging as my children get older. For the past 3 years, one of Santa's elves delivers a special package on Christmas Eve. The elves are very busy, so they usually ring the doorbell and leave before we can get to the door. Inside the package, there are pajamas for each member of the family. These aren't your normal pajamas, you know. They come from the North Pole, and they are magic. They help Santa work "his magic" on Christmas night.
I can't wait to hear the doorbell this year, and watch Candace rush to the door to retrieve the package.
We have a Nativity scene in the center of our home to remind us of the real reason we celebrate Christmas. We bake cookies for Santa and we write a note for him to read as he is eating his cookies. For the past few years, he has even left footprints inside our house, since the fireplace had ashes in there.
As they get older, I hope to incorporate more traditions, like Midnight Mass, and Christmas Carols in Spanish.
It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas now that the weather has turned cold. It's time to let the magic of this season touch our hearts and get ready to celebrate with our families.
For the December newsletter they asked that we submit our traditional New Year's celebrations. We have people from all over the world here so it should be interesting to see what everyone does for New Years.
This time of the year has always been my favorite. As a child, I remember how exciting it was to decorate the house for Christmas. One year, our entire neighborhood decorated the street with lights, and we made sure our house was decorated to match.
Christmas Eve is a big deal back in Panama. There is Midnight Mass, and most families attend mass together, to celebrate the birth of Christ. Mass usually starts around 11:00 PM and ends by midnight. Afterwards everyone heads home, to celebrate. There is food, and neighbors go to each others homes to say Feliz Navidad. The kids get to stay up late, and of course, no presents are "delivered" until after everyone is sleep.
I guess you can say we like to party back home because New Years is a big deal too. There is more food, music, our entire neighborhood would become a huge street party. At midnight, everyone goes outside to wish each other a Happy New Year.
I miss the holidays back in Panama. I miss welcoming our neighbors to the house, sharing a bit of food and happy wishes with them, I miss attending Midnight Mass at the Cathedral, I miss home.
But new traditions are emerging as my children get older. For the past 3 years, one of Santa's elves delivers a special package on Christmas Eve. The elves are very busy, so they usually ring the doorbell and leave before we can get to the door. Inside the package, there are pajamas for each member of the family. These aren't your normal pajamas, you know. They come from the North Pole, and they are magic. They help Santa work "his magic" on Christmas night.
I can't wait to hear the doorbell this year, and watch Candace rush to the door to retrieve the package.
We have a Nativity scene in the center of our home to remind us of the real reason we celebrate Christmas. We bake cookies for Santa and we write a note for him to read as he is eating his cookies. For the past few years, he has even left footprints inside our house, since the fireplace had ashes in there.
As they get older, I hope to incorporate more traditions, like Midnight Mass, and Christmas Carols in Spanish.
It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas now that the weather has turned cold. It's time to let the magic of this season touch our hearts and get ready to celebrate with our families.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
IF
If I didn't have kids, I would
* Sleep as late as I could on weekends
* Have a spotlessly clean house
* Spend lots of money in clothes, purses, and shoes
* Drive a convertible
* Take fabulous vacations every year
* Eat out at expensive places
* Go out of town on the weekends
* Go back to school
* Read more books
BUT if I wasn't a mother, I wouldn't know
* the joy of cuddling with my kids and watching cartoons on Saturday morning.
* the pride in my children's eyes when they show me their latest masterpiece drawn in the living room wall.
* the joy of buying clothes for that little person growing inside of me.
* what loving unconditionally feels like.
* I would have never discovered how good chicken nuggets from Chick Fil A are, or how much fun it is to collect the toys inside a Happy Meal.
* the sounds of my children's laughter in the backseat of my car would be unknown to me.
* that indescribable feeling I felt when I took my children to my homeland
* I would have missed the sparkle in their eyes when they saw the ocean for the first time.
* I would not know how chaotic and fun a family meal at home can truly be.
* I wouldn't have a first grader teaching me how to properly pronounce words in English
* I would have never read the Cat in the Hat, or even know who Dr. Seuss was.
* I wouldn't know that an old, tore up bear, can keep all the monsters away at night.
* I would have never known what it feels like to have a little pair of arms tightly wrapped around my neck.
* the joy of hearing "I love you" for the first time
* the pride of watching them in their first dance recital, or scoring their first goal, or playing their first song in the piano.
* how the cry of a child in the middle of the night will wake you from the deepest of sleeps.
If I wasn't a mother, I would have never known love can have no boundaries.
* Sleep as late as I could on weekends
* Have a spotlessly clean house
* Spend lots of money in clothes, purses, and shoes
* Drive a convertible
* Take fabulous vacations every year
* Eat out at expensive places
* Go out of town on the weekends
* Go back to school
* Read more books
BUT if I wasn't a mother, I wouldn't know
* the joy of cuddling with my kids and watching cartoons on Saturday morning.
* the pride in my children's eyes when they show me their latest masterpiece drawn in the living room wall.
* the joy of buying clothes for that little person growing inside of me.
* what loving unconditionally feels like.
* I would have never discovered how good chicken nuggets from Chick Fil A are, or how much fun it is to collect the toys inside a Happy Meal.
* the sounds of my children's laughter in the backseat of my car would be unknown to me.
* that indescribable feeling I felt when I took my children to my homeland
* I would have missed the sparkle in their eyes when they saw the ocean for the first time.
* I would not know how chaotic and fun a family meal at home can truly be.
* I wouldn't have a first grader teaching me how to properly pronounce words in English
* I would have never read the Cat in the Hat, or even know who Dr. Seuss was.
* I wouldn't know that an old, tore up bear, can keep all the monsters away at night.
* I would have never known what it feels like to have a little pair of arms tightly wrapped around my neck.
* the joy of hearing "I love you" for the first time
* the pride of watching them in their first dance recital, or scoring their first goal, or playing their first song in the piano.
* how the cry of a child in the middle of the night will wake you from the deepest of sleeps.
If I wasn't a mother, I would have never known love can have no boundaries.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
The real meaning of Christmas
Have you noticed how materialistic Christmas has become? I was disturbed to hear about that person who got trampled to death at Walmart. How is it possible that, out of those thousands, there was not one person who cared enough to help that man up so he wouldn't get killed? Have we become so obssessed with having things, that we take human life for granted?
I am an optimist and I believe there is a lot of hope left in the world. We seldom hear about the Good Samaritans who help others, or the families who share what little they have because it makes them feel good. Those are not newsworthy stories. But those people are still out there, trying to make a difference, and doing their best to refocused our Christmas celebration so we'll remember the reason why we celebrate in the first place.
Growing up, we had no Santa Claus. Our Christmases were not cold, there was no snow. As a matter in fact, December is the beginning of the "summer" in Panama, and Christmas was always warm, sunny, perfect for playing outside. Santa was someone who visited those kids who lived "up north", where it got cold and it snowed. He didn't drive his sleigh down to the tropics, you know.
I never missed not having Santa, and Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. I was lucky to grow up in a place where the majority of the people are Christians, so our Christmas celebrations were centered around the birth of Christ.
You are probably wondering how could I receive gifts if Santa didn't visit me. Baby Jesus, the one who truly gives the best gifts, He brought our gifts. I knew my parents bought the gifts and I knew my mom wrapped them and they placed them under the tree. But I knew that without Him, there would be no gifts. If He didn't bless my parents with health and jobs, we would have no gifts. I knew even as a child that He was the real gift of Christmas.
I'm now an adult, raising children in a place where it gets cold for Christmas and where Santa visits every year. My husband grew up with knowledge of Santa coming on Christmas morning, so now we try to incorporate his tradition and mine during Christmas.
It is not easy, and those of you who are parents and are Christians know how secular our celebration has become. We seem to be more focused on how much stuff we get rather than on giving and living by our Christian faith. Maybe it is time we refocused our Christmas, don't you think?
I'm not Scrooge, I like gifts and I like watching my kids open their gifts on Christmas morning. Every year I try to recenter our Christmas around the birth of Jesus. My kids are still young and they probably don't notice but that's ok. Eventually, they will realize that Christmas isn't about Santa, or gifts, it is about the birth of our Savior, about giving, and helping those who need help, and spreading the love of Christ around the world.
So this year I've decided to spend less. Not because I want a fat bank account (well, I do, but that's a long way from happening), rather that money I will not spend on gifts of "obligation", I'm going to use for charity. I'm going to buy one less thing and find someone who needs it more than I or my kids and give to them. I will probably spend more time baking and giving baked goods because that's one way I show someone that I care. I will probably spend more time with my daughter making handmade gifts so that she can put a bit of her love into the gifts she is giving away this year.
I will give my kids gifts from Baby Jesus this year so they will remember the real reason we celebrate Christmas.
(for ideas on gifts, visit www.rethinkingchristmas.com
I am an optimist and I believe there is a lot of hope left in the world. We seldom hear about the Good Samaritans who help others, or the families who share what little they have because it makes them feel good. Those are not newsworthy stories. But those people are still out there, trying to make a difference, and doing their best to refocused our Christmas celebration so we'll remember the reason why we celebrate in the first place.
Growing up, we had no Santa Claus. Our Christmases were not cold, there was no snow. As a matter in fact, December is the beginning of the "summer" in Panama, and Christmas was always warm, sunny, perfect for playing outside. Santa was someone who visited those kids who lived "up north", where it got cold and it snowed. He didn't drive his sleigh down to the tropics, you know.
I never missed not having Santa, and Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. I was lucky to grow up in a place where the majority of the people are Christians, so our Christmas celebrations were centered around the birth of Christ.
You are probably wondering how could I receive gifts if Santa didn't visit me. Baby Jesus, the one who truly gives the best gifts, He brought our gifts. I knew my parents bought the gifts and I knew my mom wrapped them and they placed them under the tree. But I knew that without Him, there would be no gifts. If He didn't bless my parents with health and jobs, we would have no gifts. I knew even as a child that He was the real gift of Christmas.
I'm now an adult, raising children in a place where it gets cold for Christmas and where Santa visits every year. My husband grew up with knowledge of Santa coming on Christmas morning, so now we try to incorporate his tradition and mine during Christmas.
It is not easy, and those of you who are parents and are Christians know how secular our celebration has become. We seem to be more focused on how much stuff we get rather than on giving and living by our Christian faith. Maybe it is time we refocused our Christmas, don't you think?
I'm not Scrooge, I like gifts and I like watching my kids open their gifts on Christmas morning. Every year I try to recenter our Christmas around the birth of Jesus. My kids are still young and they probably don't notice but that's ok. Eventually, they will realize that Christmas isn't about Santa, or gifts, it is about the birth of our Savior, about giving, and helping those who need help, and spreading the love of Christ around the world.
So this year I've decided to spend less. Not because I want a fat bank account (well, I do, but that's a long way from happening), rather that money I will not spend on gifts of "obligation", I'm going to use for charity. I'm going to buy one less thing and find someone who needs it more than I or my kids and give to them. I will probably spend more time baking and giving baked goods because that's one way I show someone that I care. I will probably spend more time with my daughter making handmade gifts so that she can put a bit of her love into the gifts she is giving away this year.
I will give my kids gifts from Baby Jesus this year so they will remember the real reason we celebrate Christmas.
(for ideas on gifts, visit www.rethinkingchristmas.com
Monday, December 1, 2008
18 years ago today
It seems like just yesterday. I remember vividly how excited I was. I had never been on a plane before and I was about to get my first chance.
We arrived at the airport in San Jose, Costa Rica very early and checked in. We didn't have a lot of luggage, just a few old suitcases with our entire possessions. I was nervous, and excited. I had no idea what the rest of my life would be like but I knew it would be an adventure.
We said goodbye to my father, it was a bittersweet moment. I felt guilty because I was so happy to leave, yet so sad to leave him.
We arrived in New Orleans on a typical December day. It was gray and cold as we stepped out of the airport. I could see the city at a distance. We drove back to Mississippi and I remember wondering what our life would be like from now on. Little did I know how my life would turn out.
Eighteen years ago today, I arrived in the US. An immigrant full of dreams. I have been blessed to be able to fulfill those dreams. One by one, they have become a reality. There are still many more dreams left to achieve.
I am thankful for the last 18 yrs, for the opportunities I have had, and for the people I left behind who supported me throught these 18 yrs, who rejoiced with me every time I achieved a goal and believed I could be someone one day.
I'm looking forward to the next 18, 36, 54, 72... years
We arrived at the airport in San Jose, Costa Rica very early and checked in. We didn't have a lot of luggage, just a few old suitcases with our entire possessions. I was nervous, and excited. I had no idea what the rest of my life would be like but I knew it would be an adventure.
We said goodbye to my father, it was a bittersweet moment. I felt guilty because I was so happy to leave, yet so sad to leave him.
We arrived in New Orleans on a typical December day. It was gray and cold as we stepped out of the airport. I could see the city at a distance. We drove back to Mississippi and I remember wondering what our life would be like from now on. Little did I know how my life would turn out.
Eighteen years ago today, I arrived in the US. An immigrant full of dreams. I have been blessed to be able to fulfill those dreams. One by one, they have become a reality. There are still many more dreams left to achieve.
I am thankful for the last 18 yrs, for the opportunities I have had, and for the people I left behind who supported me throught these 18 yrs, who rejoiced with me every time I achieved a goal and believed I could be someone one day.
I'm looking forward to the next 18, 36, 54, 72... years
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thankful
I am thankful for:
* the opportunity of embarking in this journey we call Life.
* my father, who open my mind up to the world and its beauty
* my mother who made incredible sacrificies for all of us
* my siblings, who taught me about unconditional love
* all the teachers I had throughout the years, who planted in me the desire to learn and keep on learning every day of my life.
* my aunt Michaela who showed me how to be a true Christian
* my grandfather "Abuelo", the head of our family, who taught me about hardwork, loyalty to our family.
* my grandmother "Abuela" who taught me how to cook and show my love for others in that way
* my cousins, uncles, aunts who, in spite of the distance that separate us, still show me their love and are proud of me.
* my church family, who has given me a chance to serve them and have blessed my life in so many ways.
* my husband, my companion, my best friend, because he always sees the best in me, and loves me in spite of my flaws.
* my daughter, the answer to my prayers, who has shown me how to appreciate life in a whole new way.
* to my sons, who chose me to guide them through this life
* to my God, for the blessings He bestows in me every day of my life. I hope I am able to recognize those blessings each day.
* the opportunity of embarking in this journey we call Life.
* my father, who open my mind up to the world and its beauty
* my mother who made incredible sacrificies for all of us
* my siblings, who taught me about unconditional love
* all the teachers I had throughout the years, who planted in me the desire to learn and keep on learning every day of my life.
* my aunt Michaela who showed me how to be a true Christian
* my grandfather "Abuelo", the head of our family, who taught me about hardwork, loyalty to our family.
* my grandmother "Abuela" who taught me how to cook and show my love for others in that way
* my cousins, uncles, aunts who, in spite of the distance that separate us, still show me their love and are proud of me.
* my church family, who has given me a chance to serve them and have blessed my life in so many ways.
* my husband, my companion, my best friend, because he always sees the best in me, and loves me in spite of my flaws.
* my daughter, the answer to my prayers, who has shown me how to appreciate life in a whole new way.
* to my sons, who chose me to guide them through this life
* to my God, for the blessings He bestows in me every day of my life. I hope I am able to recognize those blessings each day.
Friday, November 7, 2008
The Gift of Reading
I remember learning how to read. Back then and back in Panama, kindergarten was the time when kids got used to schedules, and discipline in schools. Most children did not go to daycare, and kindergarten was not mandatory. There was no pressure on being "ahead" and "prepared" for first grade, as there is here.
I learned how to read at home. My dad would take the time to teach me how to sound out the words. Once I was able to read, a new world appeared in front of me, and I was ready to explore it.
We had one tv at our house, and it was not for the children. My parents were very strict when it came to our tv time. The tv was off limits for us, and only 2 shows were watched at home: the news and Sesame Street.
So the majority of our time was spent playing outside and when the weather did not cooperate, we spent our time reading. My parents made sure we had plenty of material to read. Back then, salesman would come to our house, offering encyclopedias. My parents bought two sets, I can see them now. The biggest set was bound in blue, and it had at least 20 volumes. It covered every imaginable topic, from history to sports. Each volume was heavy and hard to handle for a small child but dad would help us carry it so we could enjoy reading it. The other set was red, the books were smaller, and as I recall, most of the volumes talked about the different animals in the animal kingdom.
In those books, the world was within reach. I read about world history, and learned about Greece and Rome, Plato, Aristotle, Michael Angelo, and Thomas Jefferson. I read about the US, the American Revolution, and the Civil War. I learned about the European Monarchies, and the great empires that dominated the world centuries ago. It was fascinating, even as a child, to read about this far away place I now call my home.
There is no need now for encyclopedia salesmans anymore. One can find out about anyone and anything through the internet. My daughter doesn't have to read throough countless volumes to learn about the world anymore. All she needs is a computer.
Still, I want her to experience the joy of reading. I want her to read about the world, and imagine the things that are beyond her reach. I want her to enjoy reading as much as I do. I want her to be able to compete in a technological world without losing that desire to seek knowledge. I don't want her to stop thirsting for knowledge simply because it's at her fingertips, with just the stroke of a key on the computer keyboard.
Much like my parents, I am setting the ground rules. There are books, and magazines, and newspapers for her to read. There is a computer too, but for now, I want her to learn about the world and its wonder the old fashioned way.
I learned how to read at home. My dad would take the time to teach me how to sound out the words. Once I was able to read, a new world appeared in front of me, and I was ready to explore it.
We had one tv at our house, and it was not for the children. My parents were very strict when it came to our tv time. The tv was off limits for us, and only 2 shows were watched at home: the news and Sesame Street.
So the majority of our time was spent playing outside and when the weather did not cooperate, we spent our time reading. My parents made sure we had plenty of material to read. Back then, salesman would come to our house, offering encyclopedias. My parents bought two sets, I can see them now. The biggest set was bound in blue, and it had at least 20 volumes. It covered every imaginable topic, from history to sports. Each volume was heavy and hard to handle for a small child but dad would help us carry it so we could enjoy reading it. The other set was red, the books were smaller, and as I recall, most of the volumes talked about the different animals in the animal kingdom.
In those books, the world was within reach. I read about world history, and learned about Greece and Rome, Plato, Aristotle, Michael Angelo, and Thomas Jefferson. I read about the US, the American Revolution, and the Civil War. I learned about the European Monarchies, and the great empires that dominated the world centuries ago. It was fascinating, even as a child, to read about this far away place I now call my home.
There is no need now for encyclopedia salesmans anymore. One can find out about anyone and anything through the internet. My daughter doesn't have to read throough countless volumes to learn about the world anymore. All she needs is a computer.
Still, I want her to experience the joy of reading. I want her to read about the world, and imagine the things that are beyond her reach. I want her to enjoy reading as much as I do. I want her to be able to compete in a technological world without losing that desire to seek knowledge. I don't want her to stop thirsting for knowledge simply because it's at her fingertips, with just the stroke of a key on the computer keyboard.
Much like my parents, I am setting the ground rules. There are books, and magazines, and newspapers for her to read. There is a computer too, but for now, I want her to learn about the world and its wonder the old fashioned way.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Role Models
The campaigns are over and by morning, we will know who won the election. I'm sure many of us will be relieved, and glad to be able to watch TV again without having to see a political ad.
This has been a historical race, that's what all the TV stations and newspapers have been advertising for months. It has affected everyone in a different way, I'm sure.
In my case, it has made role models for my kids out of the candidates. Not because of their political agendas, or affiliations. Simply because of who they are.
There is a woman on the ticket. A working mother. She knows what it's like to compete with men, and having to prove herself over and over again. She knows everything she does will be scrutizined, simply because of her gender. But she is still on the ticket.
This is the first election that my daughter has been old enough to understand. She has watched Sarah Palin on TV, she understands that this woman is "applying" for the 2nd most important job in this country. She now knows that a woman can aspire to the highest offices, and be respected among her peers, the same way a man is. For that, I am grateful. My daughter has witnessed history in the making.
There is also a man on the ticket who put his life on the line for this country. A man who loved it enough to fight for its freedom. His heroic act defines my personal definition of patriotism. He reminds me of those patriots, back in Panama, who fought for their right to elect the leaders of the country. He is a role model to all of my kids, not just my boys. They should love this country, and defend their freedom, and respect those who fought for it like John McCain did.
Last but not least, there is a man of mixed heritage running for the highest office. Just like my children, his parents came from very different backgrounds and his perspective in life comes from his experiences as a child. Perhaps his life is richer and fuller because he had the chance to see the world in a different manner than his peers. My kids now see Obama compete and be respected in the same manner as a white man. They too can aspire to be presidents one day. For that I am thankful.
Regardless of who wins the election, tomorrow is a new day and this election will go down in history. I hope now that it is over, we can overlook our differences and work together to continue to push this country ahead, for ourselves and for our children.
This has been a historical race, that's what all the TV stations and newspapers have been advertising for months. It has affected everyone in a different way, I'm sure.
In my case, it has made role models for my kids out of the candidates. Not because of their political agendas, or affiliations. Simply because of who they are.
There is a woman on the ticket. A working mother. She knows what it's like to compete with men, and having to prove herself over and over again. She knows everything she does will be scrutizined, simply because of her gender. But she is still on the ticket.
This is the first election that my daughter has been old enough to understand. She has watched Sarah Palin on TV, she understands that this woman is "applying" for the 2nd most important job in this country. She now knows that a woman can aspire to the highest offices, and be respected among her peers, the same way a man is. For that, I am grateful. My daughter has witnessed history in the making.
There is also a man on the ticket who put his life on the line for this country. A man who loved it enough to fight for its freedom. His heroic act defines my personal definition of patriotism. He reminds me of those patriots, back in Panama, who fought for their right to elect the leaders of the country. He is a role model to all of my kids, not just my boys. They should love this country, and defend their freedom, and respect those who fought for it like John McCain did.
Last but not least, there is a man of mixed heritage running for the highest office. Just like my children, his parents came from very different backgrounds and his perspective in life comes from his experiences as a child. Perhaps his life is richer and fuller because he had the chance to see the world in a different manner than his peers. My kids now see Obama compete and be respected in the same manner as a white man. They too can aspire to be presidents one day. For that I am thankful.
Regardless of who wins the election, tomorrow is a new day and this election will go down in history. I hope now that it is over, we can overlook our differences and work together to continue to push this country ahead, for ourselves and for our children.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
I am
I am from Banana Trees, from Polleras, and Diablos Rojos
I am from the Casa Vieja where my mom grew up, with its dark rooms filled with memories; of Abuelos' stories, of the piles of golden rice he kept inside, and the rainy afternoons in October talking about nature and learning about life.
Of summers spents with grandparents, in a house with no electricity, of sneaking out to the river, of riding horses, feeding chickens, and eating guavas right of the tree.
I am from the Chiriqui River, roaring behind Abuelo’s house, of the algarrobo tree in their front yard, of laying on the grass, listening to ghosts stories, and staying up all night wondering about what was lurking in the dark.
I am from Nochebuena y Año Nuevo spent with family, of Carnavales and Processiones during Semana Santa, from Amada and Amelia and Carmen.
I am from the family sticks together, and love and respect your older sisters as if they were your mothers; of loving our cousins as if they were our siblings and standing up for those who can’t do it for themselves.
From respecting your elders, and always doing your best. Of being proud of who you are and the place where you came from, and of understanding the value of an education.
I am from being raised Catholic, from praying the rosary with Abuela, and learning prayers tthat were passed down generations. I’m from having faith in a God who is merciful and kind, of believing in ghosts, praying to saints, and never eating meat on Good Friday.
I’m from a Buddhist father, from catholic school, from learning about the paranormal and the power of the universe. I am a mix of Catholicism and indigenous beliefs, of going to curanderos, while lighting a candle for your health to be restored. I’m Catholic, secured in my faith and my beliefs and not afraid to say I don’t agree with man-made rules.
I'm from Panama, Spain, and the Guaymi Indians, of sancocho, arroz con pollos, platanos and tortillas.
From a mother with only a 6th grade education who taught me about hard work and determination, from slumber parties with my cousins, from running across the swinging bridge without our parents knowing.
Of starry nights listening to my father telling us about the wonders of the universe, and dreaming about becoming an astronaut. Of dancing on the streets during Carnaval under the blazing sun and the cool water; of patriotic parades on Independence Day.
Of Jose’s courage, and Abuelo’s strength, of Abuela’s faith, Mom’s determination, and of Dad’s thirst for knowledge.
I am from that little bench Tio Dany made for me 31 years ago, that Abuelo kept for me all these years, of watching my kids sit on that bench and see my life realized in them; of the wooden stove where Abuela used to cook, and the sewing machine where she would fix Abuelo’s clothes while whistling a tune.
I’m from dancing with Abuela after dinner, under the light of a kerosene lamp with Abuelo watching as he smoked his pipe. I’m from the moments that were never captured in film but will remain in my heart forever.
Polleras- national dress of Panama
Diablos Rojos- traditional buses in Panama
Casa Vieja- my grandparents (Abuelo and Abuela) old house
Amada, Amelia, Carmen - grandmother, mom, great grandmother
Jose- my cousin who died of diabetes-related problems at age 33. he was like my brother.
Nochebuena- Christmas Eve
Ano Nuevo- New Year's
sancocho, arroz con pollo, platanos, tortillas - traditional Panamanian dishes
I am from the Casa Vieja where my mom grew up, with its dark rooms filled with memories; of Abuelos' stories, of the piles of golden rice he kept inside, and the rainy afternoons in October talking about nature and learning about life.
Of summers spents with grandparents, in a house with no electricity, of sneaking out to the river, of riding horses, feeding chickens, and eating guavas right of the tree.
I am from the Chiriqui River, roaring behind Abuelo’s house, of the algarrobo tree in their front yard, of laying on the grass, listening to ghosts stories, and staying up all night wondering about what was lurking in the dark.
I am from Nochebuena y Año Nuevo spent with family, of Carnavales and Processiones during Semana Santa, from Amada and Amelia and Carmen.
I am from the family sticks together, and love and respect your older sisters as if they were your mothers; of loving our cousins as if they were our siblings and standing up for those who can’t do it for themselves.
From respecting your elders, and always doing your best. Of being proud of who you are and the place where you came from, and of understanding the value of an education.
I am from being raised Catholic, from praying the rosary with Abuela, and learning prayers tthat were passed down generations. I’m from having faith in a God who is merciful and kind, of believing in ghosts, praying to saints, and never eating meat on Good Friday.
I’m from a Buddhist father, from catholic school, from learning about the paranormal and the power of the universe. I am a mix of Catholicism and indigenous beliefs, of going to curanderos, while lighting a candle for your health to be restored. I’m Catholic, secured in my faith and my beliefs and not afraid to say I don’t agree with man-made rules.
I'm from Panama, Spain, and the Guaymi Indians, of sancocho, arroz con pollos, platanos and tortillas.
From a mother with only a 6th grade education who taught me about hard work and determination, from slumber parties with my cousins, from running across the swinging bridge without our parents knowing.
Of starry nights listening to my father telling us about the wonders of the universe, and dreaming about becoming an astronaut. Of dancing on the streets during Carnaval under the blazing sun and the cool water; of patriotic parades on Independence Day.
Of Jose’s courage, and Abuelo’s strength, of Abuela’s faith, Mom’s determination, and of Dad’s thirst for knowledge.
I am from that little bench Tio Dany made for me 31 years ago, that Abuelo kept for me all these years, of watching my kids sit on that bench and see my life realized in them; of the wooden stove where Abuela used to cook, and the sewing machine where she would fix Abuelo’s clothes while whistling a tune.
I’m from dancing with Abuela after dinner, under the light of a kerosene lamp with Abuelo watching as he smoked his pipe. I’m from the moments that were never captured in film but will remain in my heart forever.
Polleras- national dress of Panama
Diablos Rojos- traditional buses in Panama
Casa Vieja- my grandparents (Abuelo and Abuela) old house
Amada, Amelia, Carmen - grandmother, mom, great grandmother
Jose- my cousin who died of diabetes-related problems at age 33. he was like my brother.
Nochebuena- Christmas Eve
Ano Nuevo- New Year's
sancocho, arroz con pollo, platanos, tortillas - traditional Panamanian dishes
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Election
I always get excited when the elections get near. Whether it is a local election or the presidential election, I can hardly wait to go to the poll on voting day, and cast my ballot.
Call me a geek, but I cherish my right to vote.
Many have heard me tell the story about growing up in a country where the people were not allowed to elect their president. I vividly remember the election of 1989 in Panama, when the candidates of the opposition party were beaten with metal pipes by military officers during a peaceful protest against the government.
That's the reason I don't take my right to vote lightly. So many people in the world do not have the power to elect their governments, yet here in this country so many people are so apathetic about the opportunity to make their vote count.
But it takes more than just casting a ballot on election day. You have informed yourself on the candidates, on their records, on what their plans are. Voting for a candidate simply because your family has always voted for that candidate's party, or because they seem "nice" on TV defeats the purpose. Of course, many will show up and vote on Tuesday without having any idea what any of the candidates stands for.
There is one election on the ballot this year that really has puzzled me from the beginning. We are electing someone to be on the MS Supreme Court. This is quite an important election, if you ask me. So many things are decided by the Justices of the MS Supreme Court, I think we should all take the time to do our research on the candidates. I've done mine.
So being this is my blog and all :-) I would like to ask you take a minute and read up on what Jim Kitchens stands for. I have had the pleasure to meet Mr. Kitchens in person, as well as his mother, wife, and son. They are excellent people and pillars of our community. I believe he would an excellent choice this election. http://www.kitchensforjustice.com/ is his website.
So, that's that. The only endorsement I will publicly give for this upcoming election. I personally can't wait to cast my ballot. How about you?
Call me a geek, but I cherish my right to vote.
Many have heard me tell the story about growing up in a country where the people were not allowed to elect their president. I vividly remember the election of 1989 in Panama, when the candidates of the opposition party were beaten with metal pipes by military officers during a peaceful protest against the government.
That's the reason I don't take my right to vote lightly. So many people in the world do not have the power to elect their governments, yet here in this country so many people are so apathetic about the opportunity to make their vote count.
But it takes more than just casting a ballot on election day. You have informed yourself on the candidates, on their records, on what their plans are. Voting for a candidate simply because your family has always voted for that candidate's party, or because they seem "nice" on TV defeats the purpose. Of course, many will show up and vote on Tuesday without having any idea what any of the candidates stands for.
There is one election on the ballot this year that really has puzzled me from the beginning. We are electing someone to be on the MS Supreme Court. This is quite an important election, if you ask me. So many things are decided by the Justices of the MS Supreme Court, I think we should all take the time to do our research on the candidates. I've done mine.
So being this is my blog and all :-) I would like to ask you take a minute and read up on what Jim Kitchens stands for. I have had the pleasure to meet Mr. Kitchens in person, as well as his mother, wife, and son. They are excellent people and pillars of our community. I believe he would an excellent choice this election. http://www.kitchensforjustice.com/ is his website.
So, that's that. The only endorsement I will publicly give for this upcoming election. I personally can't wait to cast my ballot. How about you?
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Opportunity
I am a professional woman, in a male dominated field. Even in college, males outnumbered women in the majority of my engineering classes. I knew once I entered the workforce, I would have to fight the stereotypes about women in engineering. I also knew I would have to confront chauvinism, sexism, and racism. I was up to the challenge. I knew I would have to work twice as hard as my male collegues because I had to prove to others I was smart enough and not a result of "affirmative action".
I took on the challenge because I enjoy being challenged. I picked a major that most people would never consider. I pushed myself to the max, graduated, had a job a month after graduation. I didn't stop there. I knew it would take more than a bachelor's degree to get me where I wanted to be. I enrolled in a master's degree program and went to school at night. Still not enough, not when my male counterparts were accomplishing the same goals as I was.
I went further, and took the dreaded exam required to obtain my professional engineer's license. Never mind that I had a 3 month old baby at home, and a full time job. This was important to me and my career. I passed the first time I took the test.
This is just the academic part. There is the "working hard" part to go along with the other stuff. The most important part in my opinion. I have done my work and gone above and beyond what's expected of me. I have carved a name for myself and earned the respect of my superiors and my peers. I have enrolled in leadership programs, in management programs. I have read books, I have done my homework.
Still, there is barely a crack on my glass ceiling. I often wonder if I haven't done enough. Have I not taken a class I should have? Have I not tried hard enough?
I think I have done my part. There is always room for improvement, I don't believe a person should ever stop learning or growing as a person. So I know I am not perfect, then again, no one is.
Still, it is frustrating when your peers feel that a male, with less qualifications and work experience, is better qualified for a job simply because of seniority. There is always going to be someone with more seniority than me. And I will always have more seniority than someone else. Does that mean I am never going to be able to move above that glass ceiling?
I don't want a "hand-me-down" or a promotion I did not earn. I am not asking for charity. I am not asking for what some people see as "affirmative action". I simply want the same considerations my male colleagues get. I want someone to look at my qualifications, my skills, and hard work and allow me to compete with the "guys", regardless of how long I have been here. Seniority does not make anyone qualified to do anything, experience and expertise do.
I have worked hard to educate myself. I have worked hard at every job I've had, from my times as a clerk at Walmart to my job at a Fortune 500 company. I believe my work is a personal reflection of the person I am, so I take pride on everything I do.
I don't want a "free pass" because of my gender or my ethnicity. I simpy want the same opportunity to compete.
I took on the challenge because I enjoy being challenged. I picked a major that most people would never consider. I pushed myself to the max, graduated, had a job a month after graduation. I didn't stop there. I knew it would take more than a bachelor's degree to get me where I wanted to be. I enrolled in a master's degree program and went to school at night. Still not enough, not when my male counterparts were accomplishing the same goals as I was.
I went further, and took the dreaded exam required to obtain my professional engineer's license. Never mind that I had a 3 month old baby at home, and a full time job. This was important to me and my career. I passed the first time I took the test.
This is just the academic part. There is the "working hard" part to go along with the other stuff. The most important part in my opinion. I have done my work and gone above and beyond what's expected of me. I have carved a name for myself and earned the respect of my superiors and my peers. I have enrolled in leadership programs, in management programs. I have read books, I have done my homework.
Still, there is barely a crack on my glass ceiling. I often wonder if I haven't done enough. Have I not taken a class I should have? Have I not tried hard enough?
I think I have done my part. There is always room for improvement, I don't believe a person should ever stop learning or growing as a person. So I know I am not perfect, then again, no one is.
Still, it is frustrating when your peers feel that a male, with less qualifications and work experience, is better qualified for a job simply because of seniority. There is always going to be someone with more seniority than me. And I will always have more seniority than someone else. Does that mean I am never going to be able to move above that glass ceiling?
I don't want a "hand-me-down" or a promotion I did not earn. I am not asking for charity. I am not asking for what some people see as "affirmative action". I simply want the same considerations my male colleagues get. I want someone to look at my qualifications, my skills, and hard work and allow me to compete with the "guys", regardless of how long I have been here. Seniority does not make anyone qualified to do anything, experience and expertise do.
I have worked hard to educate myself. I have worked hard at every job I've had, from my times as a clerk at Walmart to my job at a Fortune 500 company. I believe my work is a personal reflection of the person I am, so I take pride on everything I do.
I don't want a "free pass" because of my gender or my ethnicity. I simpy want the same opportunity to compete.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Randomness
I don't have a "topic" to discuss today. For starters, I have a wicked headache that refuses to leave, even though it has received an eviction notice (ibuprofen). Besides, there are several things going on in my head this morning.
* What's with artists and changing their names? First we had Prince, who wanted to be called by a symbol, then Garth Brooks who wanted to be Chris Gaines. Now Beyonce wants to be Sasha somebody. Are they insane? Is this what happens when you get famous? Brain cells begin to day and one day you wake up wanting to be someone else? Maybe they need to learn from Madonna, who still calls herself, well, Madonna.
* Has anyone been keeping up to date with the economy? It is like being on Space Mountain at DisneyWorld. It is dark and you just can't see if you are about to go up or down, you just hold on for dear life until the ride is over.
* Speaking of the economy, I never really like anything related to business. I took an economics class in high school and that was enough for me. I could not tell you what NASDAQ stands for, or what a hedge fund is. BUT I can listen to Kai Rysdall talk about the market all day long. I have a crush on his voice. I don't think anyone else on this planet can make news about the economy sound so entertaining. His show comes on at 6 PM on NPR.
* Why is it that politics always bring out the WORST in people? I'm not talking about the candidates either. I honestly think the candidates actually respect one another, but mudslinging is part of the deal.
I'm talking about the average person, the one you see on the street, talking trash about other people and feeling they are entitled to look down on others, simply because of their political choice. It happens on both sides of the coin too. This isn't a problem with only the followers of A or B party. It's on both sides.
It makes me ill, specially when people start attacking one another and they know NOTHING about the candidates' platforms, or what the candidates stand for. They have done no research on the issues; they simply are basing their support on either on what the candidate looks like, or what they think this candidate must be like in private; or what someone else said about the candidate (either a family member, church member, pastor, coworker).
Let's use our brains and draw our own conclusion about the candidates. And after we have drawn those conclusions, let's respect those who have a different conclusion than ours.
Happy Friday!
* What's with artists and changing their names? First we had Prince, who wanted to be called by a symbol, then Garth Brooks who wanted to be Chris Gaines. Now Beyonce wants to be Sasha somebody. Are they insane? Is this what happens when you get famous? Brain cells begin to day and one day you wake up wanting to be someone else? Maybe they need to learn from Madonna, who still calls herself, well, Madonna.
* Has anyone been keeping up to date with the economy? It is like being on Space Mountain at DisneyWorld. It is dark and you just can't see if you are about to go up or down, you just hold on for dear life until the ride is over.
* Speaking of the economy, I never really like anything related to business. I took an economics class in high school and that was enough for me. I could not tell you what NASDAQ stands for, or what a hedge fund is. BUT I can listen to Kai Rysdall talk about the market all day long. I have a crush on his voice. I don't think anyone else on this planet can make news about the economy sound so entertaining. His show comes on at 6 PM on NPR.
* Why is it that politics always bring out the WORST in people? I'm not talking about the candidates either. I honestly think the candidates actually respect one another, but mudslinging is part of the deal.
I'm talking about the average person, the one you see on the street, talking trash about other people and feeling they are entitled to look down on others, simply because of their political choice. It happens on both sides of the coin too. This isn't a problem with only the followers of A or B party. It's on both sides.
It makes me ill, specially when people start attacking one another and they know NOTHING about the candidates' platforms, or what the candidates stand for. They have done no research on the issues; they simply are basing their support on either on what the candidate looks like, or what they think this candidate must be like in private; or what someone else said about the candidate (either a family member, church member, pastor, coworker).
Let's use our brains and draw our own conclusion about the candidates. And after we have drawn those conclusions, let's respect those who have a different conclusion than ours.
Happy Friday!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Doctors and your health
I have been to the doctor a few times in the past week and I've began to wonder if people no longer take active part in their healthcare.
I have been having problems for a while now which I atributed to my gallbladder. Being that gallbladder issues are hereditary and other members of my family have had problems, it wasn't a stretch to think mine may be going awry.
As many times before, I have been procrastinating about seeing a doctor about it. I don't like taking medication and I will find alternative forms of healing for any ailment I have before I take a pill or antibiotic. I will do home remedies and the things my grandmother used to do to cure most of my ailments.
This time it is different. I can't find anything that will make my gallbladder better. So off to the doctor I went. Our family physician is one of those small town doctors, who practices in a small town, and treats all his patients like his family. I like him. Anyway, I told him what was wrong, he said it sounded like stones in my gallbladder, and gave me an order for an ultrasound. The ultrasound revealed there is a polyp growing in there, close the bile duct, and that's why my symptoms are very similar to those of people with stones.
Time to decide what to do next. If I had stones, I would have look for alternative ways to dissolve those stones so I could pass them. I'm not sure one can dissolve a polyp. I don't want to have it removed unless there are no more options. So the doctor sends me to see a surgeon who specializes in gall bladder removals.
I have to admit I was not going in there to schedule surgery. I figured this doctor would order another test to verify the existence of a problem, rather than just go on the results of one test.
I was quite surprised to find out he was ready to cut me open and take my gallbladder.
I won't bored you with the details of the conversation with the surgeon, but he seemed surprised and a bit uncomfortable because I questioned him regarding the proposed treatment for my ailment. I wasn't trying to be difficult, but this is my body we are talking about and I want to make sure no parts are removed unless it is needed.
The whole experience left me wondering if people no longer question their doctors. Why was this one so surprised and a bit uncomfortable with my questions? Did he think I would say ok to a surgery without having sufficient proof that this was the best course of action?
Perhaps we have become too complacent when it comes to healthcare. Maybe we are too quick to allow doctors to prescribe a remedy they think fits our situation without ever questioning them, or challenging them. I wonder if our healthcare costs, not to mention malpractice lawsuits, wouldn't be as high as they are if we actively participated in our care.
I am not a doctor and I am not denying they know more than I do about medicine. But in this day in age, all it takes is Google and a little time to find out what are common test and remedies for whatever ailment you've got. I knew there was another type of test that would show, without a doubt, the state of my gallbladder, and it wasn't an ultrasound. All I did was ask. I didn't sue, I didn't threaten, I just asked. The test is probably costly but I'm sure it is cheaper than having surgery that I may not need.
So I ask you, do you actively participate in your healthcare and that of your family? Or if the doctor says "take this medicine" or "give them this shot", you do it without asking what repercusions may come from it?
I have been having problems for a while now which I atributed to my gallbladder. Being that gallbladder issues are hereditary and other members of my family have had problems, it wasn't a stretch to think mine may be going awry.
As many times before, I have been procrastinating about seeing a doctor about it. I don't like taking medication and I will find alternative forms of healing for any ailment I have before I take a pill or antibiotic. I will do home remedies and the things my grandmother used to do to cure most of my ailments.
This time it is different. I can't find anything that will make my gallbladder better. So off to the doctor I went. Our family physician is one of those small town doctors, who practices in a small town, and treats all his patients like his family. I like him. Anyway, I told him what was wrong, he said it sounded like stones in my gallbladder, and gave me an order for an ultrasound. The ultrasound revealed there is a polyp growing in there, close the bile duct, and that's why my symptoms are very similar to those of people with stones.
Time to decide what to do next. If I had stones, I would have look for alternative ways to dissolve those stones so I could pass them. I'm not sure one can dissolve a polyp. I don't want to have it removed unless there are no more options. So the doctor sends me to see a surgeon who specializes in gall bladder removals.
I have to admit I was not going in there to schedule surgery. I figured this doctor would order another test to verify the existence of a problem, rather than just go on the results of one test.
I was quite surprised to find out he was ready to cut me open and take my gallbladder.
I won't bored you with the details of the conversation with the surgeon, but he seemed surprised and a bit uncomfortable because I questioned him regarding the proposed treatment for my ailment. I wasn't trying to be difficult, but this is my body we are talking about and I want to make sure no parts are removed unless it is needed.
The whole experience left me wondering if people no longer question their doctors. Why was this one so surprised and a bit uncomfortable with my questions? Did he think I would say ok to a surgery without having sufficient proof that this was the best course of action?
Perhaps we have become too complacent when it comes to healthcare. Maybe we are too quick to allow doctors to prescribe a remedy they think fits our situation without ever questioning them, or challenging them. I wonder if our healthcare costs, not to mention malpractice lawsuits, wouldn't be as high as they are if we actively participated in our care.
I am not a doctor and I am not denying they know more than I do about medicine. But in this day in age, all it takes is Google and a little time to find out what are common test and remedies for whatever ailment you've got. I knew there was another type of test that would show, without a doubt, the state of my gallbladder, and it wasn't an ultrasound. All I did was ask. I didn't sue, I didn't threaten, I just asked. The test is probably costly but I'm sure it is cheaper than having surgery that I may not need.
So I ask you, do you actively participate in your healthcare and that of your family? Or if the doctor says "take this medicine" or "give them this shot", you do it without asking what repercusions may come from it?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Pictures
My mom, daughter and myself at the Making Strides against Breast Cancer walk this past weekend.
My little soccer player
Monday, October 20, 2008
Lessons
This summer, our church started looking for Sunday school teachers. Truth be told, most of us don't really like getting up earlier than we need to during our weekends, so the responsibility often falls on those of us who have children attending Sunday school.
Last year, I didn't volunteer. I had excuses, the twins were small, etc. This year the inspiration came from my daughter. We were reading the church's bulletin one Sunday, and I mentioned to her they were looking for teachers. She became very excited and said she would like for me to be a teacher. How could I say no? So I signed up.
I am not teaching her class, though. This year she will going through First Communion classes, so they have a special teacher for that class. I am teaching the 3rd-4th graders this year. When I received the call, I was told these children were very bright, smart, and eager to learn. They would challenge me with questions, so I should be prepared.
They didn't tell me I would learn from them as much as they would learn from me. Our parish is small, and our class is small enough that all the kids get to participate and we (the teachers) get to interact with all of them.
Last week our lesson was about the first Christians, the things they went through, how they stood up for their faith even though they were likely to die for their beliefs.
I asked the class to think for a second about someone they knew, someone in their life, who stands up for their faith.
The first answer from most of them: my mother.
I hadn't really thought about the impact my faith could be having on my kids. To hear these kids talk about their mothers with such respect and admiration was an incredible feeling. I wonder if their moms know what an impact they have on their kids. I'm guessing they probably don't. Like me, they probably are doing the best they can to raise their children in the church, to teach them right from wrong. They probably don't expect praise, and probably don't know that their children are watching and noticing every example they set.
I'm glad I took on the challenge to teach these kids. They are bringing so many blessings to my life, and I'm learning a great deal from them.
"Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 19:14
Last year, I didn't volunteer. I had excuses, the twins were small, etc. This year the inspiration came from my daughter. We were reading the church's bulletin one Sunday, and I mentioned to her they were looking for teachers. She became very excited and said she would like for me to be a teacher. How could I say no? So I signed up.
I am not teaching her class, though. This year she will going through First Communion classes, so they have a special teacher for that class. I am teaching the 3rd-4th graders this year. When I received the call, I was told these children were very bright, smart, and eager to learn. They would challenge me with questions, so I should be prepared.
They didn't tell me I would learn from them as much as they would learn from me. Our parish is small, and our class is small enough that all the kids get to participate and we (the teachers) get to interact with all of them.
Last week our lesson was about the first Christians, the things they went through, how they stood up for their faith even though they were likely to die for their beliefs.
I asked the class to think for a second about someone they knew, someone in their life, who stands up for their faith.
The first answer from most of them: my mother.
I hadn't really thought about the impact my faith could be having on my kids. To hear these kids talk about their mothers with such respect and admiration was an incredible feeling. I wonder if their moms know what an impact they have on their kids. I'm guessing they probably don't. Like me, they probably are doing the best they can to raise their children in the church, to teach them right from wrong. They probably don't expect praise, and probably don't know that their children are watching and noticing every example they set.
I'm glad I took on the challenge to teach these kids. They are bringing so many blessings to my life, and I'm learning a great deal from them.
"Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 19:14
Friday, October 17, 2008
Pet peeve
I don't want to sound "preachy" or give the impression I know it all. I don't. I'm still trying to figure out the rest of my life.
One of my biggest pet peeve is people who give up before they even try. These are people who find a million reasons why something will not work out before they even get started. They are the ones who won't exercise because they just know that x,y,z is going to hurt, or because they know they won't lose weight.
Their glass is always half empty. They can't see the rainbow through the clouds. They want to get out of whatever rut they are in but they are afraid of failing.
I guess the reason they aggravate me so much is that I cannot relate to them. Failing is not one of my fears, not trying is. I won't say I have never had moments in my life when the skies were gray and I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I've had those times, we all have. I just didn't sit there and complained and waited for things to happen to me, rather than make things happen.
I am not perfect, I have more flaws than I care to share with you. I have been beaten down, and I have stood up every time and fought even harder. I will not quit, and those who know me well know that I will go after the impossible without any hesitation. I have fallen short of accomplishing things, but it wasn't because I didn't try. I find there is a lot of satisfaction in just trying the impossible.
If you want to run a marathon, do it. If you want to skydive, learn something new, change your career, go ahead and don't be afraid. Make a list of things that will make you feel great about yourself. Nothing in life is easy, and it shouldn't be, otherwise we would never appreciate what we have. Don't give up before you even try, don't look for reasons why you will fail.
Just give whatever you are dreaming a chance. You may be surprised.
One of my biggest pet peeve is people who give up before they even try. These are people who find a million reasons why something will not work out before they even get started. They are the ones who won't exercise because they just know that x,y,z is going to hurt, or because they know they won't lose weight.
Their glass is always half empty. They can't see the rainbow through the clouds. They want to get out of whatever rut they are in but they are afraid of failing.
I guess the reason they aggravate me so much is that I cannot relate to them. Failing is not one of my fears, not trying is. I won't say I have never had moments in my life when the skies were gray and I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I've had those times, we all have. I just didn't sit there and complained and waited for things to happen to me, rather than make things happen.
I am not perfect, I have more flaws than I care to share with you. I have been beaten down, and I have stood up every time and fought even harder. I will not quit, and those who know me well know that I will go after the impossible without any hesitation. I have fallen short of accomplishing things, but it wasn't because I didn't try. I find there is a lot of satisfaction in just trying the impossible.
If you want to run a marathon, do it. If you want to skydive, learn something new, change your career, go ahead and don't be afraid. Make a list of things that will make you feel great about yourself. Nothing in life is easy, and it shouldn't be, otherwise we would never appreciate what we have. Don't give up before you even try, don't look for reasons why you will fail.
Just give whatever you are dreaming a chance. You may be surprised.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Jeff
This blog is dedicated to my brother in law, Jeff, he is one of the kindest persons I know, and I'm priviledged to know him.
I have known Jeff for many years, too many to count, really. He has been there in the good times and the bad ones. We've had our moments when we fought, times when we didn't speak to each other, but I always knew he'd be there if I needed him.
He was there when I graduated high school, when I picked my major, when I picked Ole Miss. He believed in me even when I doubted myself. Through the years, he has offered his support unconditionally.
Last year, when I announced I wanted to run the Chicago marathon, Jeff said "I know you can do it". Before I even started training, he had given me a pedometer, and other "running" stuff to get me started.
He was there, along with my sister Joyce, and nieces Stephanie and Aurora, to watch me run the marathon last year. Even though I wasn't able to finish because they closed the race, he believed I was a winner.
What could I do to show him how much I appreciate all his support throughout the years? I took him to the first meeting for Marathon Makeover 2008. I told him he, too, could run the Chicago marathon. I sat with him in the first meeting, and told him the first mile would be the hardest. If he could get past that first mile, he could run Chicago.
And he, once again, believed in me. He signed up to train for the marathon. He went through the pain, and the exhilaration only those who have done it before can understand. And last weekend, he ran the Chicago marathon!
I could not be prouder. I am so happy that he believed in me when I told him he could do it. I am glad that I was able to "introduce" him to marathoning. I didn't get to see him run, but I was there in spirit. He finished the race, and now joins those who can call themselves marathoners.
There will be more marathons in both our futures, I hope. Maybe we'll run one together.
So thanks Jeff, for always reminded me I can achieve greatness. I've seen you do it, I'm just glad to be a witness to your life.
I have known Jeff for many years, too many to count, really. He has been there in the good times and the bad ones. We've had our moments when we fought, times when we didn't speak to each other, but I always knew he'd be there if I needed him.
He was there when I graduated high school, when I picked my major, when I picked Ole Miss. He believed in me even when I doubted myself. Through the years, he has offered his support unconditionally.
Last year, when I announced I wanted to run the Chicago marathon, Jeff said "I know you can do it". Before I even started training, he had given me a pedometer, and other "running" stuff to get me started.
He was there, along with my sister Joyce, and nieces Stephanie and Aurora, to watch me run the marathon last year. Even though I wasn't able to finish because they closed the race, he believed I was a winner.
What could I do to show him how much I appreciate all his support throughout the years? I took him to the first meeting for Marathon Makeover 2008. I told him he, too, could run the Chicago marathon. I sat with him in the first meeting, and told him the first mile would be the hardest. If he could get past that first mile, he could run Chicago.
And he, once again, believed in me. He signed up to train for the marathon. He went through the pain, and the exhilaration only those who have done it before can understand. And last weekend, he ran the Chicago marathon!
I could not be prouder. I am so happy that he believed in me when I told him he could do it. I am glad that I was able to "introduce" him to marathoning. I didn't get to see him run, but I was there in spirit. He finished the race, and now joins those who can call themselves marathoners.
There will be more marathons in both our futures, I hope. Maybe we'll run one together.
So thanks Jeff, for always reminded me I can achieve greatness. I've seen you do it, I'm just glad to be a witness to your life.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Making Strides against Breast Cancer
Many of us know someone whose life has been touched by breast cancer. In my case, my cousin is a breast cancer survivor. She was diagnosed after she found a lump during a self-exam and went to the doctor. That simple act of giving herself a self exam may have saved her life. She is cancer free, after undergoing a mastectomy.
I was so happy to see her this past summer, when I went to Panama. She is so full of life, and so happy to be alive, it is contagious. I am so happy she is still able to enjoy the little things in life. As she said to me, never take your life for granted, even the smallest things, or the insignificant moments. It all matters.
Again this year, I am helping raise money for the American Cancer Society's "Making Strides against Breast Cancer". I want to help raise awareness about this disease and educate women ( and men) about it. A little education can go a long way.
Many people around the metro area are supporting this cause also, so if someone approaches you and asks for a donation, please consider giving. Think about your mother, daughter, sister, friend. Think about all the special women in your life, and consider donating in their honor.
To make a donation for my walk, just click on my website. You can make your donation online, and every dollar makes a big difference!
http://main.acsevents.org/goto/kayra-panama10
I was so happy to see her this past summer, when I went to Panama. She is so full of life, and so happy to be alive, it is contagious. I am so happy she is still able to enjoy the little things in life. As she said to me, never take your life for granted, even the smallest things, or the insignificant moments. It all matters.
Again this year, I am helping raise money for the American Cancer Society's "Making Strides against Breast Cancer". I want to help raise awareness about this disease and educate women ( and men) about it. A little education can go a long way.
Many people around the metro area are supporting this cause also, so if someone approaches you and asks for a donation, please consider giving. Think about your mother, daughter, sister, friend. Think about all the special women in your life, and consider donating in their honor.
To make a donation for my walk, just click on my website. You can make your donation online, and every dollar makes a big difference!
http://main.acsevents.org/goto/kayra-panama10
Monday, October 6, 2008
Change is good
I'm still looking for 6 extra hours in the day, so I can have plenty of time to update this blog.
A lot of changes going on everywhere. Fall is in the air. Not only are the seasons changing, there is change in Wall Street, we have an election coming up, change is definitely in the air.
There are a lot of changes going on at home too. New opportunities in the horizon, some fading away. We are getting ready to write new chapters at home, that's for sure.
My husband has joined the ranks of Stay at Home Dads. He will be staying home, tending to the kids and all the other things that surface day to day. He definitely now has the hardest job there is, and I truly admire him for making this decision.
The adjustment will be hard, I'm certain of it. But I know the kids are going to love having daddy around all the time and having him take care of them rather than daycare.
I also know one day, when they are all grown up, they will cherish those times with dad and will admire him for the decision he made to stay home with them.
My daughter is taking piano lessons, so our house is now filled with the sound of music. She has a innate ability for music, and has taken up piano very quickly. She is growing up before my own eyes, and I'm in awe at the person she is becoming.
I know she will love having her dad around all the time, and I know this will have a great impact on her in the years to come.
The twins will also be adjusting. They will be staying home with dad, and learning how to be good men from dad.
And I will be adjusting to my new role as well. I hope I remember to be supportive of him, and to never take him or his job for granted.
A lot of changes going on everywhere. Fall is in the air. Not only are the seasons changing, there is change in Wall Street, we have an election coming up, change is definitely in the air.
There are a lot of changes going on at home too. New opportunities in the horizon, some fading away. We are getting ready to write new chapters at home, that's for sure.
My husband has joined the ranks of Stay at Home Dads. He will be staying home, tending to the kids and all the other things that surface day to day. He definitely now has the hardest job there is, and I truly admire him for making this decision.
The adjustment will be hard, I'm certain of it. But I know the kids are going to love having daddy around all the time and having him take care of them rather than daycare.
I also know one day, when they are all grown up, they will cherish those times with dad and will admire him for the decision he made to stay home with them.
My daughter is taking piano lessons, so our house is now filled with the sound of music. She has a innate ability for music, and has taken up piano very quickly. She is growing up before my own eyes, and I'm in awe at the person she is becoming.
I know she will love having her dad around all the time, and I know this will have a great impact on her in the years to come.
The twins will also be adjusting. They will be staying home with dad, and learning how to be good men from dad.
And I will be adjusting to my new role as well. I hope I remember to be supportive of him, and to never take him or his job for granted.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Trying to catch up
I need a 30 hour day, please. If I only had a few more hours, maybe I could catch up with the tons of stuff I need to do.
It seems these days I am running around, from work to school to church, back to work... It's never ending.
I spent last week in Denver attending a training class. It was my first time in Denver, and that was exciting in itself. We had a chance to stay downtown, at the Curtis. If you've ever go to Denver, check that hotel out.
Every floor has a "theme", I stayed on the "Laugh outloud" floor. The decor were basically pictures of different comedians, like Lucy, Three Stooges, etc. Really cool. And the best part, it was just 2 blocks from 16th street, where all the shops and restaurants are.
The class was very good and relevant to my line of work. I'm guessing only a handful of people would classify a groundwater geochemistry class as "good". I'm one of those people. I was reminded of how much I really like chemistry. I'm an odd bird, I know.
Came home to find one of the boys sick. Fever, runny nose, congestion. I guess it's a summer cold, aggravated by allergies. Ended up missing work most of this week, because boy#2 also got sick. He is still home getting over his illness.
Aside from taking care of the boys, there was still dance class , and piano lessons, and soccer practices to go to. I wonder what it will be like when all three kids have after school activities? One of us will have a full time job taking everyone to their respective stuff.
Last but not least, there is church. I'm teaching Sunday school and I'm also involved in another program for adults, so that also has to be added to my schedule. And of course, there is still housework to be done.
So if anyone knows how I can add another 6 hrs to my day, please share the info. I need them.
It seems these days I am running around, from work to school to church, back to work... It's never ending.
I spent last week in Denver attending a training class. It was my first time in Denver, and that was exciting in itself. We had a chance to stay downtown, at the Curtis. If you've ever go to Denver, check that hotel out.
Every floor has a "theme", I stayed on the "Laugh outloud" floor. The decor were basically pictures of different comedians, like Lucy, Three Stooges, etc. Really cool. And the best part, it was just 2 blocks from 16th street, where all the shops and restaurants are.
The class was very good and relevant to my line of work. I'm guessing only a handful of people would classify a groundwater geochemistry class as "good". I'm one of those people. I was reminded of how much I really like chemistry. I'm an odd bird, I know.
Came home to find one of the boys sick. Fever, runny nose, congestion. I guess it's a summer cold, aggravated by allergies. Ended up missing work most of this week, because boy#2 also got sick. He is still home getting over his illness.
Aside from taking care of the boys, there was still dance class , and piano lessons, and soccer practices to go to. I wonder what it will be like when all three kids have after school activities? One of us will have a full time job taking everyone to their respective stuff.
Last but not least, there is church. I'm teaching Sunday school and I'm also involved in another program for adults, so that also has to be added to my schedule. And of course, there is still housework to be done.
So if anyone knows how I can add another 6 hrs to my day, please share the info. I need them.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Happy Birthday Candace!
I saw her for the first time seven years ago today. After waiting for almost 12 hrs, she finally made her entrance into this world at 5:12 PM. I was surprised to see how alert she was. She didn't cry, she just looked around at all the people welcoming her into this world.
Her big brown eyes made quite an impression on me. They weren't typical newborn eyes, with their sleepy look. They were bright, alert, scanning the room, inspecting everything. She didn't cry and I wondered if something was wrong, weren't newborns suppose to cry as soon as they were born? It wasn't until they started to clean her up and weigh her that she cried, only for a few seconds. She stopped as soon as she heard her father's voice.
She immediately took her place in our family, commanding attention when she wanted it, as all newborns did. She was fiercily independent from the start, wanting to do everything by herself. She was a lot of hard work, but always worth it.
I look at her in awe and amazement to see what an incredible human being she is. Her compassion surpases her young life, she always has a smile, a hug, ready when you need it the most. She is bright, intelligent, and well mannered, loving, all the qualities you want to see in a child. She loves to laugh, to have fun, to cuddle and watch movies, and Ben&Jerry's ice cream.
She is a tomboy and a girlie girl all wrapped up in one. She loves to go fishing with her grandparents, as much as she loves dresses, cute haircuts, and toenail polish.
She is a gift from above, and I will be forever thankful that she chose me to be her mother.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Seven years ago
I'm pretty certain most people remember where they were, what they were doing, when the planes hit and the towers fell. I'm certainly one of them.
Even as I was watching one of those shows in the History channel, it all seemed so surreal, almost as if watching a movie with a horrible ending. If I hadn't been alive when it happened, I'd probably wonder if it truly happened.
I was 38 wks pregnant with my first child. I had preeclampsia and the doctor was going to induce so I was on my way to my last office appointment. My legs were twice their size and so were my hands, and I could no longer sleep because I could not get comfortable.
The fact I was bringing a child into this world was terrifying in itself. Millions of questions raced through my mind : What if I mess up? What if I don't know how to take care of a baby? Will I ever sleep for 8 uninterrupted hours?
We got the call from mother in law about the planes, so we knew something was happening by the time we arrived at the doctor's office. Perhaps we were too self absorbed, but none of that seemed important enough, we just wanted to make sure that kid was going to be ok and that I would be around to watch her grow up.
I sat the rest of the day on the couch, at home, watching the news unfold, and wondering what kind of world I was bringing this child into. And worrying about whether I had enough diapers, clothes, bottles and all other gadgets I thought I would need.
When people talk about the events of Sept 11 and get emotional about it, I feel bad because it was one of the happiest times of my life. The anticipation of finally meeting my first child, my little girl, the excitement of finally seeing her face overshadowed anything else that happened that day.
My heart aches for the families of those who lost their lives that day. But when I look in my daughter's eyes, I know there is goodness, hope, and love still in this world.
Even as I was watching one of those shows in the History channel, it all seemed so surreal, almost as if watching a movie with a horrible ending. If I hadn't been alive when it happened, I'd probably wonder if it truly happened.
I was 38 wks pregnant with my first child. I had preeclampsia and the doctor was going to induce so I was on my way to my last office appointment. My legs were twice their size and so were my hands, and I could no longer sleep because I could not get comfortable.
The fact I was bringing a child into this world was terrifying in itself. Millions of questions raced through my mind : What if I mess up? What if I don't know how to take care of a baby? Will I ever sleep for 8 uninterrupted hours?
We got the call from mother in law about the planes, so we knew something was happening by the time we arrived at the doctor's office. Perhaps we were too self absorbed, but none of that seemed important enough, we just wanted to make sure that kid was going to be ok and that I would be around to watch her grow up.
I sat the rest of the day on the couch, at home, watching the news unfold, and wondering what kind of world I was bringing this child into. And worrying about whether I had enough diapers, clothes, bottles and all other gadgets I thought I would need.
When people talk about the events of Sept 11 and get emotional about it, I feel bad because it was one of the happiest times of my life. The anticipation of finally meeting my first child, my little girl, the excitement of finally seeing her face overshadowed anything else that happened that day.
My heart aches for the families of those who lost their lives that day. But when I look in my daughter's eyes, I know there is goodness, hope, and love still in this world.
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