A week of planning and learning

The end of our very first year of homeschooling is fast approaching.  This has been quite the ride!  I have learned a lot about the kids, not to mention about myself.  

I've learned that old habits die hard.  I've had to let go of the "do school at home" idea I had in my head and learn to be FLEXIBLE.  If you know me, you are probably laughing.  Engineers don't do flexible well; at least this one doesn't.  

I've found myself thinking outside the box; finding new ways to engage the kids in learning without them actually knowing that's what I'm doing.  I am a "stay in the box" person; but making sure the kids don't get discouraged when they don't grasp something has catapulted me outside the box and into a realm I am not very familiar with.   
With our first year coming to an end it is time to plan for the upcoming year.  Planning is something I do well.  As my poor husband will tell you (and my friends will attest) I can research anything ad nauseum.  I have been evaluating what we used this year, determining what worked, what didn't and looking at new curriculum for the upcoming year.

Instead of paper/pen; I have a spreadsheet with a tab for each of the kids; with all the subjects I want to cover in the upcoming year and the materials that can possibly work for us; where to purchase it, how much it will cost.  Have I mentioned I'm a planner?
During the endless hours I've spent researching while the laundry tumbles in the dryer; I've come to realize there is no curriculum that will ever fully satisfy me.  Even the ones we bought that I was certain I could just pull out of the box and implement, I have tweaked to fit us.  I'm guessing most homeschool families do the tweaking because that's the whole point of homeschooling.  Being able to customize the material to fit your needs is one of the reasons we do this.

I have narrowed down math, language arts and history and found materials I'm happy with.  I'm sure there will be tweaking; and adding other sources to make it more complete.  Art and Music is one I'm going to venture out and plan on my own.  Shouldn't be that hard, right?  I'm going to try and follow our history curriculum and discuss art/music from that period; so at least I have a road map.
However, when it comes to science; the engineer in me simply isn't satisfied with what I've found.  Either it is outrageously expensive; too simplistic in its approach, too boring.  I want the kids to be excited about science as I was when I was their age.  Science has to be experienced.  Yes, there are terms to learn, and plenty of reading; but it has to be fun!  That is the only way they will want to stick with it (and I'm secretly hoping to be raising future scientists but that's a post for another day).
So I think I will be putting together this year's curriculum for the boys at least.  They want to learn about animals/bugs (I'm guessing this is universal for boys?).  I've found a few books to help me piece together something fun and still complete for them.  

As for my girl, 7th grade is tough (in all possible ways).  I have found a few resources I'm still researching.  I want to build a foundation for the high school science and still make it fun.  This is my artsy child (dance and piano are her passions) so I have a bigger challenge selling her to science and math. 

So that's what's been happening in my world.  We have been schooling at home, schooling on the road, going to the movies, attending concerts, breathing tons of pollen while enjoying some time at the park.  It seems we are endlessly on the road, even more so now that when the kids were in regular school!  They have been making new friends, spending time with old ones; and adjusting beautifully to this homeschooling adventure.

 

Six months into our homeschooling journey

We've only been homeschooling for six months?  Really?  It seems like we've been doing this a lot longer.

I've been asked often how things are going for us.  I'm never quite sure how to answer this.  Do they really want to know about our struggles, are they hoping we'll answer something like "not going so well" so they can convince me I need to send the kids back to "real school"?

My answer is simply "things are going well" unless I'm talking to another homeschool mom and then I just feel the need to confess all of my worries and concerns.  Notice I said "my worries".

Truth is, things are going better than I would have guessed.  My family seems to have adapted to this new chapter in our lives a lot better than I.  They have learned to do lessons in the car, to use Netflix documentaries to supplement curriculum; to research topics they like on their own, and to adjust learning times during full moons (when my boys seem to turn into banshees).

Me, on the other hand, I'm plagued with doubt every single week.  Are they learning enough? Did I pick the right curriculum? Are they being motivated to learn? Are they retaining what they are learning? Are we doing enough?  The list goes on and on.

It has been six months and I can now honestly say Homeschooling is not for the faint of heart.  Unless you believe you are truly doing what's best for your family, it's best not to attempt this journey.  Because you are going to have to remind yourself often that this is meant to be, and that no one, no school and no teacher, will ever love and understand your kids better than you.

In these six months, I've had to change some of the curriculum we had picked.  I had read all about other families changing theirs, I was even told by some homeschool veterans that it happens.  Naive as I was, I figured I would pick the right curriculum the first time and wouldn't have to change a thing.  Go ahead, laugh.

The fact is my kids just hate some of the curriculum I chose.  It is boring to them.  It doesn't excite them, or inspire them to learn more.  The twins asked me to please get them another science book because they were tired of coloring pages and boring books.  They wanted to do experiments and collect bugs, and all the other things that are not on this 2nd grade book.  

My husband has done a great job finding a way to do the lessons using what we have at hand.  I didn't run off and buy more stuff because, well, I'm not made of money, and I wasn't sure what to buy this time around.

Mind you, I did my research.  My husband will tell you how many countless hours I spent looking and researching and comparing before I chose this curriculum.  I didn't want a boxed set, so I pieced together what I thought would be best for my kids.  Turns out, I picked the curriculum with the correct content and the wrong delivery method.

Textbooks/worksheets/assignments/tests is how I was educated.  One of my earliest memories of school comes from reading all my 1st grade textbooks before the first day of school (back in the school I attended in Panama, parents had to purchase the books).  I couldn't wait for the day my parents went to buy the textbooks, so I could read them!  So I ended up getting that type of material for my kids.  Don't get me wrong, the curriculum is good, and very complete, but  it's not for my kids.  

So I'm starting over.  I bought a book 101 Top Picks for Homeschool Curriculum.  I probably should have invested in this book before we started but it's never too late.  I finally figured out that my children learn very differently from me, so the curriculum I love and would thrive using would frustrate them beyond belief (lesson learned!).

Still, six months into this journey, I'm more confident in my decision to homeschool.  I've watched my kids truly enjoy learning.  We have stumbled, we have had moments when we wondered "what in the world have we done?",  we have gotten on each others' nerves and wished we could just send them back to school so we could get a break.  

But we have not regret it.  We have watched our kids be happy, learning at home.  We have become closer as a family.  No more sitting at the table, while someone cries because they are exhausted and do not want to do any more homework.  No more mom crying because the kids are crying and frustrated.

So we march on with the rest of this school year, doing the best we can with the materials we have; while I search and research for new materials for next year.  And those new ones do not work; I won't feel like I've failed the kids.  Because the beauty of homeschooling is we can make changes and adjust as we need to do.  And as principal of this school, what I say usually goes.

A Bucket List- In reverse

Today is the big day.  The big 40.  As I looked around my office (tastefully decorated with items from my Bucket List); it occurred to me that the list of things I've done  in 40 years is a lot longer than the list of things I have yet to do.

So here is my Bucket list in reverse, a list of things I've done/accomplished in 40 years:  Actually it's a list of things I remember I've done. 

1)  Lived in Panama for 15 years.

2)  Won an award in Oratory in 5th grade.  I was quite proud.

3)  Have seen the Hallie comet (remember that?)

4)  Took my first trip abroad in 6th grade: to San Jose, Costa Rica.

5)  Two years later, I moved to San Jose, Costa Rica. Pura Vida!

6)  Attended my first symphony concert at the Teatro Nacional in Costa Rica.

7)  Moved to the USA a month shy of 17

9)  A year and few months later, I moved 3 hours away to attend College           (Hotty Toddy!)

10)  Graduated college with a degree in Chemical Engineering.
11)  Got my first job a month later

12)  Decided to enroll in graduate school (at night) while working full time

13)  Got married (after swearing I would never marry)

14)  Had my beautiful daughter (after saying I'd never have kids).

15)  Passed the Professional Engineer exam, with a 6 month old baby at home. I wasn't sleeping much, might as well study, right?

16)  Moved to Oak Ridge TN. 

17)  Finally finished my Master's degree.  My daughter was 1 the day of graduation and ran around the Grove at Ole Miss while I got my diploma.

18)  Moved back to MS

19)  Found out we were having twins.

20)  Became the mother of two gorgeous boys, and life has never been the same.

21)  Decided that training for a marathon while the twins were babies was a great idea.

22)  Made it to the Chicago Marathon in 2007.  Wonderful experience. 
  
23)  Thought I could be an artist.  Started painting in watercolors.

24)  Somewhere along these times, started this blog.

25)  Places I've visited:  Denver, Colorado; Albuquerque, New Mexico; Austin TX; New Orleans, LA; Memphis TN, Knoxville TN, Chattanooga TN, Chicago, IL, Cincinnati, OH; Louisville, KY; Tallahasee FL, Charleston, SC; Navarre Beach, FL; Pensacola, FL; Orlando, FL, Kennedy Space Center, FL; Washington DC; Niagara Falls;  Toronto, Ontario, Canada.  

26)  Became a homeschool mom

27)  Learned to drive a manual transmission car.

28)  Flown in a helicopter.  Rode on a boat in the MS Gulf.

29)  Been to Disney World (Senior Year trip).

30)  Got a TATTOO!

The first 40 have been great.  Looking forward to the next 40.

It's a wonderful life

As my 40th birthday approaches, I've found myself wondering what pearls of wisdom I'd like to share with my kids, and nieces and nephews.  
Then I realized that wisdom is relative.  I think it is wise to study engineering and most people would consider major surgery without anesthesia a lot more appealing.  So wisdom, like beauty, is in the eyes of the beholder.
 
So, instead of imparting wisdom, I  thought I just share the things I've learned, and discovered in the last four decades. There may be some wisdom in these life experiences, maybe there will be a good story or two, but there are absolutely lots of life lessons wrapped up in 40 years.

These are the things I'd probably tell my younger self if I could travel back in time.  Or maybe not.  Life is an adventure.

1)  Dream the impossible dream.  No matter how absurd it may sound to others.  Dreams are what life is made of.

2) You are beautiful, simply because you exist.  No one needs blue eyes and blond hair to be beautiful.  

3) Don't tell your mom you will never study anything that has to do with math. You will.  

4) Hard times will come.  That's how character is built.  You will survive the storms.  Keep your eyes on the horizon.

5) There is nothing your sisters won't do for you.  Even when you've pulled their hair and fought with them; and thought you couldn't wait to get away from them, you love them and will forever want them near.

6)  1989 will bring heartache.  Don't shy from it.  It will make you stronger.  It will teach you compassion, and will show you God is never far away when we need him.  

7)  You don't have all the answers.  Not at 15, not at 18, not even at 40.   You may think you do, but really, you have no idea what your life is going to look like tomorrow, much less a few years down the road.

8) Reconsider that hairdo for the prom, I beg of you.  One day your kids will see the pictures and wonder why there is a poodle on your head.

9) Reconsider that prom date.  You probably won't (see #7 above) but you should.

10) Go to Ole Miss.  Don't even bother looking at any other school.  You will forever think of those years as the best of your young adult life.  And you will make friends that will last a lifetime.

11)  Don't tell people you will never marry or have kids.  You will.  See #7 again.

12) You will have your heart broken more than once. You are going to think you'll never get over it.  You will.

13)  The right guy will come along, and in 6 weeks time, you will know he is the one.  And everyone who thought you were never getting married will think you've lost your mind.  Refer to #11 again.

14) You will eventually get that Latina body you wanted growing up.  It may come after 3 kids but it will come.  Embrace it.  

15) Niagara Falls will take your breath away.  And standing there, you will call your mom and tell her how one of your childhood dreams has come true.  

15) Travel every time you get the chance.  See the world.  

16)  Join that wedding planning board online.  You will find lifetime friends there.  And yes, people are going to think you are crazy when you talk about these friends you've met online, but who cares what people think?

17)  Wear a bikini every time you get a chance before kids.  Because one day you will have to work hard for a bikini worthy body.   Trust me on this.

18) Remember as a kid, how you used to sit at the table for hours because you didn't want to eat your vegetables?  Your kids will do the same thing, if you try to implement that method of persuasion.  

19)  No matter what you say, you will tell your kids "because I said so".  One cannot reason with 4 year old kids, don't even try.  

20)  You will get a tattoo one day.  Your younger self may be horrified at the idea, but your older self will embrace it.  

21)  You don't need to diet.  Ever.  Just eat in moderation and stay active. 

22)  Your body at 39 will look very different from your body at 25.  It's called growing up.  Embrace it, and love it.  Your daughter will learn  to love her body by watching you love yours.

23)  Always, always be proud of your roots, and your heritage.  Teach your kids to be proud of their heritage too.  

24)  There is more good than evil in the world.  There will be times it will seem the opposite is true.  But if you ever need a reminder, look at those around you: family, friends, church.  It will make you see the good in the world.

25)  Have NO regrets.  Zero.  None.  Even the hard times bring lessons.  Learn the lesson, and move on.  You will make mistakes; you are only human.  Learn from the mistakes and grow from them.  There is no point in spending life regretting the decisions you've made.  Move on.

I can see 40 shining brightly from here.  I'm not dreading it, I'm ready to embrace it.  So many people don't make it to 40, I owe to all of them to be happy I made it this far.  And in the words of my grandfather, age is just a number.  Your attitude towards life is what counts Make yours count. 
 

Thank you 2013

Thank you 2013 for the lessons you brought our family this year.  Some have been painful, some have been easier to accept; but overall we have grown together as individuals and as a family.

Here is a recap of some of the lessons you've brought us:

1) No todo lo que brilla es oro :  Abuelo used to say that.  Not everything that's shiny is gold.  

2) Not everyone who smiles at you is your friend.  Your true friends accept you and love you, without conditions.  

3) Let go, and let God.  Repeat as often as necessary.

4)  When in doubt, see #3.

5) Homeschooling is quite an adventure.  It can work for you.  You will get what you put in.  No excuses.

6) No matter how much the kids fight, they love each other fiercely.  Even when they have each other on a headlock.

7)  Homeschooling = more dirty clothes, more dirty dishes, HAPPIER kids.

8) My husband is a very good teacher.  No one knows my kids better than him.

9) Work is challenging but no job is harder than being a parent.  Period.

10) You will have to live with the decisions you make.  Choose what is best for you and those you love, and forget about everyone else.  If they are your friends, they will support you.  If they were fake, they will phase their way out of your life.  In the end, those who stay were meant to be in your life.  

Looking forward to the lessons 2014 will bring.

This is how we rock and roll!

It has been three weeks since we took this picture on our first day of homeschool.  We have learned so much since then, and most of the lessons didn't come out of any of the books we are using.  

We were called to homeschool.  The circumstances that brought us here do not really matter, the fact is we were meant to do this.  From the moment we became parents, homeschooling our kids was part of our lives' plan and we had no idea.

Our boys are thriving with the one on one attention they are receiving.  They are happy as 7 year old boys should be. Last year while attending regular school, Cade had a lot of problems learning to read early in the year; while his brother was reading very well since kindergarten (thank you Mrs. C!).  This caused lots of doubts and self esteem issues for Cade.  We eventually got over that hump (after many nights reading and crying together) but his self esteem has taken longer to rebuild.

These past three weeks I have seen him blossom.  His self esteem has come back in full once he realized he is as smart as his twin brother and so very good at math.  Would he have reached his point in regular school?  I'll never know for sure, but I'm glad to see he is learning more than just academics now.  He is learning he was made to be great!

For Braden, last year was a struggle because of discipline.  Academically he was doing wonderfully but he would finish his work early and would start to play.  Or talk to someone else in class.  We would get notes every other day about how he was "interrupting class" by playing, or talking. His grades were great, his behavior was the issue.  He simply got bored waiting on the other kids to finish their work.
Needless to say, he no longer has to wait for anyone else.  He can finish his work and move on to things that matter to a 7 yr old, like PE and looking for bugs outside.  Even his handwriting (which was a huge issue for us last year) has improved considerably, just in three weeks of homeschool!

As for my sweet Candace, she has always been a great student.  It has taken her (and me!) more time to get used to the more relaxed approach that comes with being homeschooled.  The first thing I've noticed is her piano playing skills have improved tremendously.  She is was a good player already, but now she has more time to practice, but most importantly, she wants to practice.  I no longer have to remind her (over and over) to take time to practice.
She is also feeling more comfortable debating different subjects with me, and doesn't get flustered now when I ask her questions that are not in the textbook. She now goes and finds the answers and knows it is ok to know things that are not in the books.

My kids are learning from more than just books.  They are watching documentaries and using their computer to find videos on the educational websites.  They are going outside to explore and looking forward to field trips.  

"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord".  I believe homeschool was part of that plan for our family.    

We made it thru week 2!

We survived our second week of homeschooling without any casualties.  No one has ran away from home in a screaming fit, no one has asked to go back to "regular school", no one has locked themselves in the bathroom and refused to come out.  And that's just the adults!

The truth is, we have settled into this a lot easier than I anticipated.  The kids are slowly finding their own rhythm.  The twins have adjusted really well, they are ready and eager to get their work done in the morning so they can get to the important stuff, like PE lessons and terrorizing their sister.  My girl is taking her time finding her rhythm.  Slowly, she is taking more and more ownership of her school work; and feeling more and more confident about structuring her daily schedule.  

Every day brings a lesson, at least in my opinion.  So here are a few of the lessons/realizations/thoughts for our 2nd week of homeschooling.  (Disclaimer: These are not all my own.  My husband is the one who does the teaching, but he doesn't blog and many of these are his thoughts.  The others are the kids, a few are mine.  I'm simply the crazy lady with the laptop and a blog)

Starting every "school day" with a prayer makes it go easier.  We are a Christian family. Even though we did not choose homeschooling for religious reasons, we are raising our kids in the ways of our faith.  Every week, I write our weekly Bible verse and place it on our bulletin board.  Every morning, my husband prays before everyone begins to tackle their assignments.  Wednesday, he mentioned how well things were going, and said "Starting every day with a prayer really does help me get thru the lessons".  

We are all teachers, even my husband.  If anyone had told my husband he would one day homeschool his children, he probably would have called them crazy (among other things).  I'm not sure anyone would expect my Harley ridding husband to have the patience to teach.  Yet here he is, educating his children.  And he is so good at it!  He finds ways to engage them, and keep their interest, and even quiz them without them realizing it. 

The cleaning fairy does exist.  Really, she does.  I'm not sure how it happened, but now that we are homeschooling, our house is cleaner than when the kids were attending regular school.  Mind you, it is NOT spotless.   There are still shoes they forget to pick up, and dishes they forget to take off the table.  But I can actually see the floors! All the school books and notebooks are always in its place and I don't have to wonder where the pencils are when it's time to work on something.  Maybe the kids like to have things in their place?  Nah, I'm pretty sure the cleaning fairy is real.

The laundry fairy, however, does not exist.  Laundry multiplies, no matter where your kids attend school.  I had this idea that once we started to homeschool, the amount of laundry would diminished.  I mean, the kids could do their school work in their pajamas.  Rather than wearing 3 outfits each day (school clothes, home clothes, then pajamas); they would wear maybe 2.  Nope, apparently my kids like to look their best no matter the occasion.  

Kids are highly adaptable creatures.  I have been amazed to see how easily they have become homeschoolers.  I know every week won't be easy.  I'm sure there will be whiny days, and sick days, and days we will all reconsider this choice. But the kids do understand that, even though we have a flexible schedule now, school work is still required.  They don't need a classroom, a chalkboard, to understand that school work is important.  

We are a team, all five of us.  I knew we were a family. I married the boy, we had the kids, we became a family.  But now we are a team.  The success of our homeschool depends on all of us; not just the adults.  The kids have taken their place on the team and are doing their part.  Our girl will help dad with a lesson if the boys are just not "getting it" the way he is explain it.  They don't fuss when she does, they simply listen to her.  The boys do their assignments without issues, always ready to get done and move to the next thing.  And my husband, the tough guy who many doubted could do this, is doing an amazing job at engaging and teaching the kids.  
I'm doing my part too, I guess.  I do the planning and make sure their weekly schedules are ready for them.  As my friend Terri said, I'm just managing the team, they are doing the real work.

And they are doing a beautiful job.




 

For the love of Learning

I would be lying if I said I knew I wanted  to homeschool the minute I held my daughter in my arms almost 12 years ago.  How we came to this decision is a long story for another time.

As I did my research (have I mention how much I research stuff?), the more it seemed homeschool kids simply love to learn.  That's not to say that children who attend regular school don't, I guess what I'm trying to say is there are more opportunities for homeschool kids to explore a topic they are interested in, research it, enjoy it.   Again, not bashing schools or teachers.  I attended private school, public school and I loved to learn and still do.   

It is hard to explain what I mean when I say I want my kids to have a love of learning.  As I was driving home the other day, a memory came to mind of my 6th grade science class.  Yes, I can remember that far back.  It was almost *gasp* 30 years ago but I still remember it.   I think that memory summarizes what I wish all children, not just mine, would get to experience in a school setting.

My 6th grade teacher's name was Carmen de Esquivel.  How impressed are you that I remember her full name?  I surprise myself sometimes.  She had a reputation for being very strict, so going into her class I had some apprehension.  I remember our lesson on cloud formation, which was part of the whole unit about the water cycle.  My science book had this pretty picture that depicted all these different shaped clouds, and the name scientists gave those clouds.  We sat in the classroom and listened to the lesson, and tried not to stare out the window into the big blue sky.

Until Ms. Esquivel told us to line up by the door; and guide us outside.  Into the playground area.  And told us to look up at the clouds.  If I close my eyes, I can still feel the sun on my skin, and the wind on my hair as I stood there looking at the clouds on the beautiful blue sky.  She asked us the names for the different shaped clouds, and share some more information while we were seating outside on that playground.

I have never looked at the sky in the same way again.  I'm sure that's not the only lesson that took place outside but that's the one I remember when I think about my love of learning.  I want that for my kids.  I want them to never look at anything the same way again.  I want that one lesson to spark their curiosity and make them thirst for knowledge.

So yes, homeschooling affords me that opportunity.  They can spend time learning about volcanoes, or Egyptians mummies; passed the allotted time they would have at school.  

I know there are more teachers out there like Ms. Esquivel who try to spark that love of learning in the kids they teach.  I'm thankful for her and for them. 

Homeschooling. The least conventional way

After much anticipation and what seems like years of preparation, we have finally joined the ranks of homeschoolers. 


In the months prior to our joining, I have spent countless hours reading blogs from other homeschooling families, researching curriculum, looking at pictures of "school rooms" in Pinterest; and finally I've come to the conclusion that we are like no other homeschooling family.  At least none I've found.

For starters, I am not the one doing the teaching.  I'm the one who gets up in the wee hours of the morning, yells at unsuspecting drivers on the way to work, and puts in 9 hours each day in a downtown office.  Where most homeschooling families have a mom doing the teaching, ours has a dad (wonderful dad!) who is willing to take on the task of educating the kids to my ridiculously high expectations.

And yes, while I'm at it, I know sometimes I have unrealistic expectations, and that I expect my kids to be smarter than most children, but that's just me.  I figure if we aim high and not achieve it, we'll still achieve our goal.

As I was saying, I spent countless hours looking for blogs about families like ours: families where dad did the schooling, mom went to the office every day, and they both had a significant role in their children's education.  I'm pretty certain there are homeschool dads out there, we can't be the only family with one.  I came across a few blogs that had not been updated in several years, which made me wonder: did the dads call it quits, did they get too busy and no longer had time to update their blogs? I guess I'll never know.  

I have been very surprised to be asked "are you quitting your job?" every time we've mentioned homeschooling.  Are we conditioned to think men are not capable of teaching?  Because every professor I had in college was male, and there are many male teachers in elementary and high school.  Is it because mom usually stays home?  I'm never sure why the question come, but it is usually accompanied by a look of disapproval.  

What most of these people never bother to ask is what my role is in this homeschooling adventure.  I wonder if they think simply because I'm not doing the teaching, I'm not involved in the schooling.  

Truth be told, I'm the mastermind of this whole operation.  *insert evil laugh* .  Once we made the decision (it was a joint decision, not just mine); I knew the researching, learning, finding curriculum, getting organized, keep up with records, etc, would fall on me.  That's just the roles we have in our family, I'm the one who does the planning, even if my husband does the execution of the plan. Homeschooling is no different.  I put the lesson plans together, I keep their schedules straight, I run the operation behind the scenes.  

We are just on week two of homeschooling, but I can see already it will only work if all parties (parents and kids) communicate.  The kids let me know if they don't like something in a lesson.  Dad will tell me if he notices the kids listen better if read to, rather than having to do the reading, or if the material in a textbook is boring.  Homeschooling is more than just school at home, it's a family endeavour.  

So here we are.  Homeschoolers.  I can add that to the list of things I never thought I would be.  But I'm certainly glad we are on this path.

Tic Toc, Tic Toc

Time is ticking away and soon we will be starting our school year.  Our first as a homeschooling family.  I have moments when I'm super excited and confident; and moments of cheer panic and doubts.  I sure hope this is normal. 

Right now, while most of my friends with school age kids are buying school supplies, I'm looking over the curriculum I chose, and starting to plan our lessons, but most importantly trying to figure when to start and end the school year so we can cover all the material I want them to learn; and still have fun learning.  Not an easy task, let me tell you.

Some families choose box curriculums, every subject published by the same company, and everything is ready for day one.   Needless to say, I didn't go this route.  All three of my kids have very distinct learning styles, one size does not fit all in this house.  I decided to be an "ecletic homeschooler".  Sounds fancy, doesn't it?  That's just a nice way to say I'm a rebel (hotty toddy!) and I don't like being put inside a "box".  Not even a curriculum box that would have made all this planning a whole lot easier.  

So, I have pieced together the curriculum for the kids.  I have chosen math from one company, english and science from another, history from another.  You get the idea.

Without further ado, I present to you our game plan.  I reserved the right to change my mind any time during the implementation of said plan, and to drop something if it just isn't working.  And to keep the tearing of my hair to a minimum.

Math of course, because this is a must.  Picking a curriculum wasn't exactly easy.  Did you know there is a spiral method of teaching math? I didn't til I started looking for a curriculum.  Ruled out the spiral method because that's what the kids used in school last year and I did not care for it; specially for the boys. 

Science is another "must".  There is an unspoken rule (not sure the kids are aware yet ha!), they must like science.  It's fascinating, it's fun, it's alive.  How can you not like it?   I was so excited when I got the teacher's guide for 6th grade and saw there is a whole unit of chemistry in the book!  How cool is that?  (if you had nightmares related to chemistry in school, I'm sorry.  My nightmares were biology related)

English and all it entails.  This one really confused me because I kept finding "language arts" curriculum; and I had no idea what the heck that entailed.  So, I have a curriculum that covers grammar, reading, writing.  And we'll use a website they used last year for spelling.  That should cover it.  To be honest, of all the courses I'm planning for this year, this one is the scariest.

History also made the list.  My girl asked to do ancient history this year, so that's what we are doing for her.  For the boys, will probably do US History.  Simply an intro to history.  I love history, but didn't like having to read it for class and memorize stuff.  So we are definitely going to try and make it as much fun as possible.

Geography because, in my opinion, there are too many people who don't have a clue there is more than Mexico south of the US border.  Sorry, that's a huge pet peeve of mine.  If I had a dime for every time someone asked me if Panama was a) part of Mexico or b) in Florida; I would have enough to retire now.  Anyway, so all three of the kids will be doing geography this year. Didn't buy a curriculum for this one; I'm going to use a map and focus this year on the American continent. So far they know where Mississippi and Panama are located.  

Spanish is also on the list.  This one is right up there with math, english, and science.  Rule numero uno, Spanish only when talking to me.  We'll start slow but they will have to practice it to learn it.  I'm hoping by the end of the year, they'll be able to at least understand when their grandmother asked them if they are hungry.

Bible was a request from my girl.  She wants to read more of the Old Testament so that's what we are going to do.   

Life Skills or home economics because everyone should know how to cook, sew,and iron including my boys.  I learned to cook when I was 12, so I know my girl is ready, and it's not too early for the boys to help mix pancakes, and make cookies.  We have discussed sewing before but hadn't done anything about it yet.  Again, no curriculum just teaching her the things I learned as a child.  And teaching her to iron clothes.  Maybe I need to recruit my mom to help with that one.  I'm not a fan of ironing.  

Art because at some point they are going to have to color, right? I'm not an artist, and the artistic genes skipped me.  I think we'll visit the museum of art, learn about a few famous artist, and let the natural artists in them come out.

I sure hope we can fit all that into a schedule without overwhelming everyone.  We still have dance, and piano for the girl, martial arts for one of the boys, and soccer for the other.  

Now comes the fun part.  Put it all together, in a cohesive manner, so everyone knows what we are doing ahead of time.  Sometimes I find myself hoping for a clone, so I can spend more time planning, and planning.  

Wish us luck, will you?  My goal for this year is to make learning FUN.  I want the kids to realize they can learn everywhere, not just inside a classroom and not just from a textbook.  Let the fun begin!






 

I'm just me and that's good enough

Since we decided to homeschool earlier this year, I've been doing research.  I've read blog after blog, I've researched methods, looked at curriculums, read reviews for both methods and curriculums.  I've had a full homeschool overload.

It seems the more I read, the more I researched, the more my insecurities grew.  I had a few nights where I couldn't go to sleep, overwhelmed with the numerous decisions we had to make.  What curriculum is the best?  What method should I use?  What if my kids hate me for homeschooling them?

I came across a blog the other day (posted by another homeschool mom) that made me realize I'm not alone.  It's ok to be afraid, as long as you don't let the fears take over.

Bottom line is we are not like all other families.  We haven't ever fit the "mold" that most families fit in.  Why start now?

Our homeschool is going to be a reflection of who we are, of our family.  It's not going to be like anyone elses'.  We are unique individuals, and a unique family, so our choices for homeschooling will be unique too.

Talk about having an epiphany!

We may not have a "homeschool room" that resembles a classroom, but we are still going to learn.  We may not use the curriculum the majority of the people we know use, but we will use what works for us.  After all, this "school" doesn't have to fit inside any mold, we can make what we want to fit our needs.

I'm not a perfect mother but I love my kids more than anything in this world.  I want them to love to learn, to be fascinated by all the things that surround them, to discover the beauty of this world.  There is not curriculum that will teach that.  That can only come from us, and how much fun we make this adventure.

So I've come to terms with the fact I'm just me.  A very analytical, scientific mother who does endless research before making a decision.  I may choose engineering based math for my kids and expect them to learn Spanish this next year, and add home economics to our curriculum.  But the bottom line is, I won't set them up for failure.  

I'm their mother, and I know them better than anyone.  And as long as I let my love for them guide the decisions we make, that will be good enough.

Yes I'm scared!

Truth be told, I'm scared.  That's not something I readily admit because I like to think I am fearless.  I guess when it comes to my kids, I'm not.

We decided earlier this year to homeschool.  We know it's the right thing for our family, the kids are excited, we are excited.  We've found a great support system, friends to encourage us along the way, and we are ready to embark on this journey.

But I'm scared.  There.  I said it.  I am scared.  Not afraid.  Scared.

As my good friend Terri said (she is a lot better with words than I), it's ok to be scared because keeps moving you forward.  Being afraid paralizes you.

So I am scared.  We are going to homeschool, and I know it's going to be a great adventure for all us.  But I'm still scared.  There are so many decisions to be made.  I have yet to narrow down my curriculum because I keep thinking "is this the best one for my kids?".  I worry that my children will hate me for making this decision for them.  I worry that I'll be hindering their learning by teaching them at home.

Then I remember that we are their first teachers.  No one, no teacher in the world, no matter how dedicated, loves them more than we do.  I know what they like and what they dislike.  I know how they learn, what excites them and what bores them. I know one loves dinosaurs and will watch documentaries about them without ever saying "this is boring".  I know the other loves learning about animals, and insects.  He will start a collection of bugs if I let him bring them in the house.  And my girl loves music.  All music. Not just the pop music kids listen to these days.  She knows about Bach, Beethoven, and Mozart and has her favorites.  She loves the Beatles, and has taught herself to play several of their songs on the piano.  

I can build a curriculum around their likes and dislikes or  I can buy a curriculum that comes in a box.  The choice is mine.  It all depends on whether I am going to be scared or afraid.

I guess I will chose to be scared and move forward; praying along the way that fear doesn't get in the way.

A legacy of service

A few years back, I was attending a retreat centered around the 7 Habits of Highly Effective people.  One of the exercises they had us do that week was to write down a mission statement for your life.  I thought at first that was kind of silly.  A mission statement for my life?  I just want to be happy!  Do I really need to write that down?

They explained that companies use mission statements to keep their goals in mind, and so we should create one for our lives.  I set out to create mine.  Turns out it was more difficult than I had anticipated.  I eventually came up with five things, one of those "leave a legacy in the lives of my children".

What exactly is a legacy?  The dictionary says it is "something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past".  So it can be just about anything.   Their values, their faith, their bad habits (ha!).  

Events of this past weekend and this week have gotten me thinking about my legacy to my kids.  What do I want them to carry with them into the world the day they leave my home?  This last weekend, at the conference I attended, this lady talked about how she learned about service by watching her parents.  She never realized other parents weren't like hers, involved in the community, and always helping others.  She simply thought all families just did that.

I want to leave a legacy of service in my kids.  I want them to count their blessings, and share them with those less fortunate.  I wish for them to have a heart of service, a giving heart.  I realize that's not something you can teach by just telling someone "you should be charitable, you should share your blessings with the less fortunate".  You have to lead by example.

I hope one day, when my children leave my home, they will have learned that sometimes, giving money is not enough.  Sometimes people just need (as the song says)  "someone to lean on".  Someone to listen.  Someone to care.  And that the best gift we can give others is our compassion, not our money.  It doesn't matter if you have no money, you always, always have something valuable to give someone in need: your time, your compassion.

The Bucket List

I created a bucket list a few years.  Things I want to do before I (literally) kick the bucket.   I have put it aside, since are pricey (going to Japan); some are risky (sky diving) and some I had just forgotten all about.

It wasn't until we set down this homeschooling path that a friend reminded me of that item on my list:  teaching.

I'm as terrified as I would have been if I was going into a school to teach.  These are my kids, we can drive one another insane on occasion and now we get to spend more time with one another and learn together. 

But no one knows them better than I, no one understands them better so I'm confident we will adjust and move forward in this journey and be glad we took it.

I'm also excited I'm starting to cross things off the list before the proverbial 40 runs around! 

A Thankful Heart

I grew up in a Christian home, attended a Christian school most of my life, and I've been a practicing Christian for as long as I can remember. But praying in public has never been "my thing".

The church I grew up in was very formal.  We didn't say "amen" to show we agreed with the pastor's remarks during the sermon.  There was no such thing as "revival".  We prayed in church, we prayed in school, we prayed at home.  In public areas? Not so much.

I'm an introvert, so that whole idea of praying in public has always made me uneasy.  Not because I doubt my faith but because introverts like me don't care to be on the spotlight.

My children are being raised in a different church than the one I grew up in.  They have been to revival, they have heard "amen" during service, and prayed before meals at church and at home.

I've always given thanks for the food on the table.  If you know me well, you know my family has been through a lot, so I never take any blessings for granted.  I know so many go without so I'm grateful for the blessings I have.  But I've never been one to pray over my food at a restaurant.  Remember that introvert thing?  Add that to the fact praying in public always felt "fake" to me.  I felt as if I was trying to call attention to myself.   I'm not passing judgement on those who do it, I'm simply sharing why I never had.

A month or so ago, we went out to eat with the kids; which isn't that different from all other times we go out to eat, as it seems we usually go with them everywhere.  Anyway, once our order arrived, one of my boys said " wait, don't eat yet, we have to bless the food".

I have to admit, I was shocked.  We say the blessing at home, usually three times, because each child wants to say their version.  But we have never done in  public.  So I was surprised at his suggestion.

So we bowed our heads and he blessed the food.  I'm sure people looked at us, and in all honesty, I wasn't even aware at that moment.  All I could think about was how proud I was to know my children have thankful hearts.

All I've ever wanted was for my kids to be thankful for all their blessings, and to share those blessings with others.  It never occurred to me they would be sharing that blessing with me. 


 

My kids are perfect... NOT!

Do you ever hear your parents voice inside your head, saying something to you about how to behave when you were at someone else's house?  I do, all the time.

My parents were very clear about their expectations of me.  When it came to school grades and my behavior while at school, there was no doubt I needed to be at my best.  They didn't necessarily expect straight As, they did expect me to do my very best always.

The same extended to my behavior outside the house.  I was a "reflection of them" when I was not at home.  If I misbehaved, it reflected badly on them as parents.  My parents were far from perfect but I knew they were serious about their expectations of me. I always knew I had to be polite when I was at someone's house, to say please  and thank you, and to be respectful of all elders, regardless of who they were.

It is now my turn to be a parent, and to remind my kids they are a reflection of me when they are outside our home.  They are expected to be polite and respectful at all times, and I expect any adult who sees them acting like brats to tell me so I can address it.

I'm not naive to think my kids are perfect.  They can drive me crazy in a millisecond, and there is very little (if anything!) that you can tell me about them that I don't already know.  If someone tells them they have said something rude or have misbehaved while in their presence, my children know I will take that very seriously.  Every time they are going somewhere without me they get the "speech" as to how they need to behave.

Do they always behave when I'm not around?  I'm sure they have moments but hopefully those are far and few in between.  And hopefully the adults supervising them have said something to them (and to me!) so we can correct the issue.

Kids are kids, I get that.  Even adults act like brats from time to time.  But it never ceases to amaze me when I see  children who act like idiots without so much as a "look" from their parents.  They have no respect for their own parents, much less any other adult.  It doesn't matter where they are; they act as if they rule the world and the rest of us in it.  

I know kids get unruly, mine do, specially in a group of kids.  I'm talking about more than unruly. I'm talking disrespectful.  Ignoring adults trying to redirect their actions, or behaviors, and just doing whatever they want to do.  

The thing that bothers me most?  When the parent is either watching and does nothing or is told about it, and actually looks upset to hear their precious angel is anything but.  Do they really think their kids are perfect?  

I think most people who know me and know my kids know they can tell me when my precious angels misbehave and expect me to do something about it.  Most of the time that something involves an apology to that teacher, church volunteer, whoever they have disrespected with their behavior.  Am I too hard on my kids?  I don't think so.  I don't want them to grow up thinking they are entitled to act like brats any time they want.  I certainly don't like putting up with brats that belong to me, much less brats who belong to other people.

I'm not sure when parents stopped telling their kids how to behave.  Or why some parents think their kids are entitled to disrespect other people without so much as a "don't do that" look.  
Kids will act like kids but there are things (like raising your voice to an adult, or ignoring what they are telling you) that are big no-no in my book.  

So if you are ever around my kids and they act like fools, please tell me.  I promise I will address the issue and you will have my respect for bringing it to my attention.  If I tell you your kids have been disrespectful, I hope you extend me the same courtesy.  
 

Are you sure about this?

A few months ago, my husband and I made the decision to homeschool our kids. Yes, you read that right.  We are going to homeschool.

In typical ME fashion, I have worked myself (more than once) into a panic attack over this life changing decision.  It's not that I doubt I can teach my children what they need to know.  I know I can.  That's the easy part of this decision.  It's the venture into the unknown that keeps me awake at night.

I have spent countless hours reading about homeschooling.  I have researched it, asked question, researched it some more, and then some more after that.  I know it's the right thing for us.  I want our kids to have a LOVE for learning as I did when I was growing up.  I want them to be excited about history, and arts, and literature.  Yes, I want them to be "nerds" as I was.

I had the typical misconception about homeschooling than most people do.  I admit it.  I figured all those who choose it were "different" (as in weird), were radical in their beliefs, have 20+ kids, grown their own food, and live in a compound.  Mostly because I didn't really know any, other than the ones I saw on that TLC show.  I'm sure there are families out there that probably fit that description.  But I was pleasantly surprised to find there are many families that fit under the "normal" umbrella (whatever normal means).

How we arrived at this decision isn't as important as the fact we chose it for our family.  If you know us, you know we are anything but your typical family.  We like it that way, we thrive in being different, and guess what? Homeschooling fits right into our definition of normal.

I have to admit, it is overwhelming to realize you are in charge of your children's education.  I have no doubt we can teach them what they need to know.  But there will be no one to blame but us if they don't understand the Pythagorean Theorem, or Newton's Laws.  

At the same time, it is exciting.  It's an adventure.  One we have been on without even knowing.  Every trip to the zoo, or the aquarium, the museums, they were all learning opportunities.  Our trip to Panama, collecting seashells on the beach, all educational opportunities.  We have been teaching our kids outside a classroom all along.

I want my children to LOVE learning.  That's one gift I received as a kid.  My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, they all homeschooled me without even knowing there was a name for such a thing.  They made me want to learn, from books, from people, newspapers, and magazines.  I was the nerdy kid who got excited about school because I just knew there was a new adventure waiting, a new discovery just around the corner.

Perhaps it was the fact the educational system is different in Panama.  Perhaps it was that I had amazing teachers who nurture my desire to learn.  Or the fact my parents encouraged me to learn outside of the school building.  I don't know, but my desire to learn new things has never diminished.  

I want that for my kids.  I want them to lay outside and look at the stars and find the constellations.  Or notice the different cloud formations on the sky.  To be excited about discovering new things every day.  

Yes I know.  My children are not me.  There are no guarantees they will love learning as much as I do.  But I can at least try, can't I?  

So soon we will be joining the ranks of homeschooling families.  Don't hold your breath waiting for the announcement we are increasing the number of kids in our family.  Or that I'll be moving into a compound, or wearing skirts down to my ankles.  Not going to happen.

Do expect to hear all about our adventure, including the exciting parts and the not-so-pleasant moments.  I'm excited.  I have a road map, with numerous detours, all pointing to the same exact destination:  Happy Kids who embrace Life as the learning adventure it is.  

I was in jail...

Some of you know a month ago I was in jail.  I spent 3 ½ days in jail.  It would probably shock some of you to learn I enjoyed every second I spent there; and I’m thankful God sent me there.

I was not alone, I was there as part of the Kairos MS team, with one big goal in mind, to bring God’s love into the lives of these women inside the prison.  That simple was our mission, to bring God’s love.

As anyone would guess, I had my own prejudices and fears before going in.  After all, these women are in there for committing a crime.  But as the time grew near, I found my fears and prejudices were changing.  I wasn’t afraid of getting hurt while in jail, I was afraid that I would get in the way, that I would allow my humanity to overshadow what God was trying to do thru me. 

I was blessed to go as part of an incredible group of volunteers who are passionate about this ministry and who were willing to share their experiences with me.  So I figured, if they continue to serve, it must be a pretty great experience, right?   

To say I was blown away by it would be an understatement.  There simply are no words that can express the experience.  I spent 3 ½ days inside a prison, laughing, crying, sharing with inmates and loved every second.   When the weekend came to an end, I was sad.  There were good byes and there were tears.

Since I left the prison, I have thought about my sisters in Christ that are inside CMCF.  I wonder how they are doing, what their life has been like since their Kairos weekend.  Some of their faces pop into my head more often than the others.  I figured God is telling me I need to pray for them individually.  So I usually stop and pray. 

I learned during my weekend in prison we are all just one bad decision away from being in jail.  Just one.  We have all made bad choices in the past.  Some could have landed us there, in jail, alongside these women.  We were blessed to have someone in our lives “who knew better”; who watched over us and directed us.  Some of these women didn’t.  But hopefully now they have Christ.  And with Him by their side, they can do anything.

Christ was there that weekend.  Only He could take my prejudices and turn them into love.  His love.  I hugged these women and felt His love pass from me to these women.  Going into this weekend, I didn’t know what crimes any of these women had committed.  I honestly didn’t care to know.  They have sinned and their sins are public, and out there for the world to know.  But we are all sinners, and all of our sins are the same in God’s eyes.  Christ died for their sins just as He did for mine.

Since I left the prison, I have found out what their offenses were.  And you know what?  It hasn’t changed my experience, or the way I feel about these women.  They are His daughters too.  He loves them as He loves me.  And they are worthy of my prayers too. Each has a place in my prayers and my heart.

I’m so thankful God called me to serve Him inside that prison, on that weekend, to those women.  So incredibly thankful for the opportunity and for the blessing.  I ask, next time you are praying, pray for the inmates inside CMCF, pray for the Kairos volunteers, and for all those who minister for those inside prison walls. 

Sorpresas te da la vida...

Life will surprise you.  Yes indeed!

Most of my adult life, I've heard women say "I've been dreaming of my wedding day since I was a little girl", or "when I was a kid, I knew what kind of wedding I wanted", etc, etc.  You get the idea.

I wasn't one of those girls.  I never dreamed of my wedding day.  NEVER.  Never wondered what it would be like to walk down the aisle, dressed in a white gown, with a veil on my head and with a handsome man waiting for me at the altar.  I didn't daydream of the day prince charming would come and sweep me off my feet, and we'd ride together into the sunset.  Not once.

Maybe you are wondering what kind of childhood I had. Was I a tomboy?  Am I missing the girl gene that makes the other girls dream of prince charming?  Maybe the answer is yes to both.  I never liked dolls, never in my almost 40 years owned a Barbie.  Never wanted one, not even as a kid.  One of my earliest memories is asking my mom for a Tonka Truck for Christmas.  Yes, you read that right, a Tonka truck.  It may seem odd, specially when I grew up surrounded by four sisters.  I still remember how happy I was to find a green Tonka jeep under the tree that year. 

Don't get me wrong, I liked boys growing up.  I had crushes and swooned if one of them looked my way.  But from there to dreaming they would one day be my chosen beloved, that was a leap I never made.  That stayed with me until college.  My friends, those who knew me when my last time was still Gutierrez, will probably tell you I was very adamant about one thing :  No marriage, and No kids.

Of course, I never took into account that a handsome man would sweep me off my feet, and that I would find myself married at the young age of 26.  Or that I would find myself the mother of three kids.

I'm glad life surprised me, and brought my way the 4 people who share my house.  They are pretty awesome folks, and definitely love me enough to put up with me all the time.  I have my best friend under the same roof, and three amazing little beings who remind me every day I have a purpose in life. I would not trade them for the world.

The other day I read a statement from a mom who said she missed being pregnant and missed breastfeeding.  It made me wonder if I'm really missing that gene I mentioned earlier.  I don't miss my pregnancies.  I love my children, and I'm glad I was able to give them life but I did not enjoy any part of the pregnancy.  I didn't like having to carry 30+ extra pounds, not to mention the extra fat I accumulated eating for 2, and 3 people at once.  I do not miss having to sleep on my side, or my back, when my favorite position is sleeping on my belly.  I do not miss having to lay in bed for weeks to give the boys more incubation time.  I don't miss the extra swelling of hands, feet, and face, sleepless nights, not to mention the heartburn.  I simply don't. 

I wonder if those women had the perfect pregnancies, and that's why they miss it.  If they did, good for them.  I'm glad all that is over and done. 

I'm a huge advocate for breastfeeding.  I am lucky enough to be part of a culture where breastfeeding is not only encouraged, but expected.  I don't miss breastfeeding though.  Even though I tried it with both pregnancies, it was difficult for me.  Not to go into details, but it made me feel inadequate as a woman and a mother.  Thank God for the lactation consultant who told me I could bond with my twins as I bottlefed them, just as I did when I breastfed them.  I know many women out there successfully do it, I wasn't one of them.  My experience wasn't what I anticipated, so I don't miss it.

When my firstborn was on her way, I wondered if I was made to be mom.  I didn't fit the typical idea of what a mom should be.  I had a career and all intention to keep it after she was born.  What if I didn't have any maternal instinct? What if I didn't love this new person instantly?

I have learned in the last ten years that being a mom is about building a relationship with this new person.  Candace and I had to get to know each other, and become the mother and daughter we are today.  Yes, I loved her from day one and would have died for her (and still would!) but I am reminded often she is her own person.  Not an extension of me.  Not an accessory.  She is her own being, and she deserves to be respected as such.  The same is true of my boys. 


I am not the perfect mother.  There are many times, after they are in bed, and I climbed (exhausted!) into mine, when I wonder if I am doing a good job. Am I raising human beings who will go out into the world and make a difference in some way?  There are many times when I feel as a bad mom.

I look at these kids, at the amazing people they are, how kind, loving, and caring they are; and I think maybe I don't have to do anything other than provide an environment where they can thrive.  They were made to be amazing, loving creatures; that's not my creation.  Maybe all I have to do is love them, guide them, and watch them grow.

La vida esta llena de sorpresas...

Are you kidding me?

You know, I like my job.  I enjoy what I do, and most days I actually like the people I work with.  But every now and then I'm left wondering what the f*** is wrong with people these days.  Why can't people simply do their job?

I work in state government, and yes I have heard every comment imaginable about how lazy state employees are, how "easy" we have it, etc.  The majority of the people in this agency don't fit in the stereotype that's out there, most of us (yes, I'm including myself here) are willing to go above and beyond to do what we were hired to do.  Perhaps it has to do with the fact the majority of the people here are scientists and engineers.  I honestly do not know.

Most of the time, I haven't cared if the person in the office next door was snoring while I was buried under a pile of reports, they simply weren't my problem.  Their job performance didn't affect mine, so I could not care less if they didn't do anything.  Did it aggravate me? It most certainly did, just not enough to leave me reaching  for the antiacids.

Well, now I'm responsible for other people's job performance.  Don't get me wrong, I like telling people what to do.  My siblings probably would tell you I was born to boss people around.
I don't mind telling people something needs to get done.  But I dislike having to tell someone to do something over, and over, and over, and over, and over...  I repeat myself plenty at home, I don't want to go to work and have to do the same thing I do with my kids.

Why is it so difficult to simply do what's expected?  I don't understand.  Is it lack of work ethic?  Do they know no better, or do they simply don't give a rat's behind?

I've had to spend some time asking myself if I'm expecting too much from people.  Am I asking they do things the way I would do them, or just asking that they do them?
Maybe it's a little of both.

I expect that when I, the supervisor, ask you, the employee to do something, that you'll at least look me in the eyes as I explain it to you and give me the respect I deserve. Not because I'm the boss, but because I'm a person and not a piece of furniture.


I'm not perfect.  I am loud and speak my mind more often than I should.  I'm sure my former (and probably current) supervisor would say I can be opinionated and stubborn.  I'm also sure none of them would say I've ever done "just enough" to get by at any job I've had.