Just call me Mr. Magoo

Does anyone remember the cartoon character Mr. Magoo?  The bald, blind man who would run over everyone driving because he couldn't see?  

Today I feel like him.  You see, I forgot to make an appointment with the ophtalmologist for my annual exam.  My contacts, which I'm only suppose to wear for 30 days before throwing them away, are now 30 days passed their expiration date; and the earliest appointment I could get is still 4 weeks away.

So at the risk of causing my eyes permanent damage, and rendering myself completely blind, I decided to wear my glasses.  
You see, I have a love/hate relationship with them.  I love the fact they allow me to see, but I don't really like to wear them.  I guess it all goes back to being in high school and being called "nerd" because not only did I need glasses, I was sort of a nerd.

I see other women who look great wearing their glasses and think "I wish I could look like that with mine".  I just can't pull off the look.  I guess I've gotten so used to the reflection on the mirror that I don't recognize myself with glasses.

I put my contacts away last night (just in case); and wore my glasses to work today.  Talk about trying to adjust!  Everything looks weird, I spent half the morning feeling like I had too many tequila shots before work; and finally at lunch; I closed my door, took them off and allowed my eyes to rest for a bit.  

Will I make it until my appointment? I really don't know.  I'll give it a few more days and then we'll see what happens.  In the meantime, just call me Mrs Magoo.

Things I've discovered after a year of homeschooling

Summer flew by and school is about to start once again.  We are no longer "new" to homeschooling, our first year is behind us.  So I thought I would list the things I have learned and encountered in the last year or so; about myself, my kids, and everyone else we know.

1) Homeschooling is NOT easy.  
Some people believe homeschooling families choose this path out of laziness.  The thought is laughable at best.  All your household chores are still there, and now you have your child's education to focus on.  You may never catch up with your sleep, your laundry, or the rest of the chores.  There are field trips to be taken, lessons to be covered, and guess what?  There are no sick days.
Kids don't play video games all day; and eat junk food while you watch soap operas.  That's a myth.

2)  Kids dread the first day of school, even those who are homeschooled.
This is a sentiment I cannot relate to because I loved school.  Literally.  I was the kid who could not sleep the night before due to the excitement.  It wasn't about seeing my friends again; it was all about what I was going to learn. 
I have heard my kids say "ugh, I'm not ready to start school again".  They sound like any of the regular school kids, don't they?  You know why they feel that way?  See #1 above.

3) Just because you homeschool in your PJs, doesn't mean you are lazy or unable to function in the "normal" world.
Forgive me for a second here, because I'm about to vent and the following is MY personal opinion.  You don't have to agree with it; but you don't get to badger me about it either.
On most days, the kids will do their work in their PJs. We are in our house and I don't want any more laundry than a household of 5 can produce.  I don't make them get up and change clothes in order to do school work because we are NOT recreating school at home; we are homeschooling.  There is a huge difference.  If they want to change clothes, fine.  If they don't, that's fine too. 
My children function just fine in the "real world".  The fact they do their work in their PJs doesn't hinder them from joining the "real" world.  When it's time to join the rest of the human population, my kids know to dress appropriately.  They understand that PJs are not acceptable attire for church, piano lessons, or museum trips.  
I am still trying to figure out why anyone would think the attire you wear while doing schoolwork makes you a "better functioning" human.  I see plenty of people dressed in professional attire every day who can't function in normal society.  I rest my case.

4)  How do I know what to teach, and how do I know my kids are learning?
Well how did I know that they were learning while in regular school?  Truthfully, some things they weren't learning. They memorized it for a test; and it was out of their mind once the test was done.  I know they are learning because my kids have taught my husband and I more about animals in the last year than we even realized they knew; just from watching educational shows about it.  They have read more encyclopedias than most people do in a lifetime.  They have a need to tell me all about something they read in a book at the library; and they are excited about exploring the backyard and looking for "new" species of bugs.  That's how I know they are learning.
As to what to teach, how did I know my kids were learning what they were supposed to learn while in school?  I honestly didn't, I just trusted the school.  Well, I follow the same guidelines the schools do to make sure they learn what they need.  Simple as that.

5) People from the "good school districts", who live in the nice subdivisions, homeschool too.
Most people know I live in a very crappy school district.  My kids attended private school for a long time; and we now homeschool them. I hear often how I need to move to x,y,z town because the school is better; and you guessed it, the kids can go to school there.
Turns out there are families who live in the elite school districts who homeschool.  So I am ok staying in the crappy district and homeschooling too.

6) All kids are not created equal.
Well duh.  Everyone knows that, right?  I knew my kids were different from each other from day one. What I didn't realize was how differently they learn.  They process information in a way unique to them.  While textbooks and worksheets work for one, the other needs a more auditory/visual environment.  I don't force them to sit still at a table while we do school. Yes there are things that have to be done while sitting down, like writing for example. But they don't sit through every single lesson.  Some lessons are on the computer, science experiments may take you outside into the woods or into the kitchen.  

7) Dads can homeschool too
Here is a big one for us.  When we made the decision to homeschool; the very first question people had was "are you going to quit your job?".  Imagine the shock when I said no.
You don't have to stop working to homeschool, there are plenty of moms who work from home and outside the home who do it.  I'm one of the lucky ones who has a husband who is willing to do most of the schooling while I'm in the office.  
Most people seem shocked, some ask if I double check after him to make sure the kids are learning.  When did we decide men can't teach?  There are plenty of male teachers in schools right now; and all my professors in engineering school were males.  So why the double standards?

8) Everyone is an expert about what you should be doing; specially those who have never homeschooled.
Everyone.  I've been told what curriculum I should use, how I should teach; etc.  By people who have never done it.

9) Everyone has a horror story about someone who homeschooled and did a horrible job.
I don't know every homeschooling family in the world.  The ones I know are committed to providing the best education for their kids.  Period.  I'm sure there are lazy people out there who use the term homeschooling to allow the kids to run wild while they watch soap operas.  And if you come across one of them, report them.  That's not homeschooling. I'm not entirely sure what's the point of those stories.

10) I have my kids' best interest at heart.
Don't assume that I don't care about the future my kids will have because I homeschool.  That's the reason I do it; because I want the best for them.
I know plenty of graduates from "good" schools who have done zero with their lives.  Going to a regular school doesn't guarantee success in college or anywhere else.  

Homeschooling is a journey.  You will come across people who will support you and some who will do what they can to put you down.  Just remind yourself of the reasons you made the decision and keep going. 

Besides, why worry about what people say?  You were made to be different.

The Bucket List

I created a bucket list a few years.  Things I want to do before I (literally) kick the bucket.   I have put it aside, since are pricey (going to Japan); some are risky (sky diving) and some I had just forgotten all about.

It wasn't until we set down this homeschooling path that a friend reminded me of that item on my list:  teaching.

I'm as terrified as I would have been if I was going into a school to teach.  These are my kids, we can drive one another insane on occasion and now we get to spend more time with one another and learn together. 

But no one knows them better than I, no one understands them better so I'm confident we will adjust and move forward in this journey and be glad we took it.

I'm also excited I'm starting to cross things off the list before the proverbial 40 runs around! 

I just felt like running...

Remember Forrest Gump? I can relate to his quote right now.

I have the itch to run again. Not just run, but train for a half marathon. 13.1 miles.

I trained for the Chicago marathon in 2007 and it was a great experience. Even though the race was cancelled and I didn't get a chance to officially finish the race, it was still one of the best experiences of my life.

I learned a lot about myself while training for Chicago. I learn that age is just a number, that there are a million excuses I could have use to quit. I had 9 month old twins and a 5 yr old when I started training, a full time career, a husband. A million excuses. The amazing group of people who trained with me helped me get through it. They have no idea how much they helped me.

In my closet, there is a somewhat new pair of running shoes. My faithful Saucony Omni shoes, that got me through the streets of Chicago last October. Should I bring them out of retirement?

The 2nd MS Blues Marathon is coming up in January 2009. Last year, I was an spectator, happy to cheer for the runners, some of whom have become my friends. This year, I want to be one of the runners.

Training won't be easy, but the best things in life never are. I find myself missing those long runs from my training last year, when it was just me and the pavement. That section of my day when it's all about me, and what I can do, how far I can run.

Then there is my daughter, who will be 7 on Friday. She wants to run the Kids Marathon portion of the Blues. She has been asking when we are going to run together so she can start logging in her miles. There is no better incentive than to set the example for her.

So I may be running the Blues, and passing the torch to my daughter.

New habits, old habits, haircuts, DNC, RNC, Hanna, Ike...

So many things to blog about, so little time.

I was happily surprised to see the money I spend on private education is being put to good use. At least some of it. Part of my duties as the mother of a first grader include attending a mandatory meeting. This meeting is designed to tell us what our kids are going to learn, and how we can help them study at home. In the meeting, they mentioned the kids would be bringing home an "agenda" to keep up with their homework assignments, tests, etc.

First I thought I had misread the list of school supplies because I never bought an agenda. Then they told us they would provide one. I figured it would be a regular notebook, where they could write their assignments and we, the parents, could keep up with it.

She brought the agenda home yesterday for the first time. I started looking through and it looked vaguely familiar. Then I read the intro pages and the agenda is geared towards kids and based on the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

How cool is that? Yes, I'm showing my geek side by getting excited about something like this. But I think it's awesome she is learning to be organized at an early age, and even moreso, that she is being introduced to some great ideas at an early age.

On to the old habits part. I really need to quit drinking coffee. I quit before but I love my coffee. Or at least I need to make an effort to add more calcium into my diet. Osteoporosis runs in my family and I should really make a serious effort to exercise more and eat more calcium rich foods.

I'm getting a new haircut today. Not sure what yet, but I want to try something new and different. I picked up a magazine at Walmart and they have gazillion different short styles in one magazine. I decided not to buy it, otherwise I would probably never be able to pick just one. Whatever I pick, it will be better than the mop I'm sporting right now.

DNC, RNC... Have been watching both, listening to both sides spew venom about the other candidates. I WANT TO HEAR YOUR STAND ON THE ISSUES! Why is that so hard? I get that you have to badmouth the other guy because it's expected. But I'm more interested to hear YOUR stand on the issues that matter to me: the war, the economy, abortion, immigration, energy. Then I can draw my own conclusions about you and the other candidate.

It's a little insulting to hear over and over again the candidates tell me why I shouldn't pick the other guy. I want you to tell me why I should pick YOU over the guy. Americans are smart enough to make their own conclusions (at least I like to think so, but then, we have made some dumb decisions in the past when it comes to presidential elections). Present the facts about your plan and let us draw our own conclusions.

I'm looking forward to the first debate, not only because I want to see the candidates finally answer questions about the issues, but because it's at my beloved Ole Miss campus. But Tim Russert will be missed, I really like watching his show. I wonder who will be the moderator?

Then there is Hanna and Ike, headed somewhere. Will they come close to us, will people evacuate next time, will they stay put? I see all these "forecasters" trying to tell us where the hurricane is going. Please, you can't even tell me with precision whether it's going to rain tomorrow!!

Resurrecting this old blog

It's been a while since I updated this blog. Lots has happened, mostly life so it's been hard to catch up.

We went to Panama in July and had a great time. This was our first, big vacation as a family of 5 so we had our challenges. Overall, it was a great experience. I learned that my kids are better behaved than I thought, and that my husband is more patient and understanding than I give him credit for.

Our family had a chance to spend time with the rest of the family, and that was great. My kids immediately embraced this new group of folks as if they had always known them. They enjoyed everything, the food, the places. We had meltdowns, as would be expected, but I think they were born to travel.

My husband had a chance to see where I grew up, my home, the place where I came to be. He says he liked it (did you, really?). But I wonder if it has made a difference for him to truly know where I came from and all the obstacles I had to overcome, and to meet the people closest to me, even after all these years?

It was great to see my family and spend time with them. I am ready to go back, this time Candace has requested an "only girls" trip. I really hope we can do that next time. It was great to show her where I grew up, and tell her about what my life was like when I was her age.

Came back to MS and to work and then life got hectic again. Trips to the ER because one fell off the couch and later busted his lip. Everyone is fine now.
Work was crazy busy during the month of August, I'm still trying to catch up.

Then school started. We are the parents of a first grader, and I feel like I'm the one in school. There is math homework, phonics homework, reading homework... Not to mention piano lessons, dance lessons, soccer lessons, and soon First Communion classes. My little girl is growing up way too fast, in 2 weeks she will be celebrating her 7th birthday!

Back in June, I took the seminar on the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and now I'm trying to implement those. Turns out it was harder than I thought but I have discovered there are things I can do on a daily basis that will help me be a better mother and wife, not to mention a better person. Taking the time to think about what I can do every week to make a difference in one of those roles is really having an impact in my life. Still a work in progress though.

Then there is the world around me. Hurricanes and political conventions. We were better prepared for Gustav than we were for Katrina, a good thing considering we have 2 more kids than we did back then.
Political elections bring out the best in some people and the worst in others. I hope it brings out the best in me, although I have to admit I'm not perfect. I get easily annoyed by narrow minded people who believe their way and their beliefs are the only ones that are valid.
No two people are ever going to agree on anything, not even my twin boys who shared the womb.

So it gets very annoying when people share their political views and get highly offended because others don't see it the way they do, or because others don't agree with them.
I find it highly offensive for someone to assume I'm not intelligent enough to formulate my own opinion and expects me to adopt theirs.

I believe what I believe. Simple as that. My viewpoint is not the only one. I see the world the way I do because of my life experiences. I don't expect other people to see the world the same way if they haven't walked in my shoes. And no one has walked in my exact path, and even those who have walked a very similar path, have different views.

I like to debate about politics and religion but have discovered most people don't want to debate, they want to argue. They want to tell me my views are wrong and "convert" me. I really enjoy watching people get all worked up about their political views, and why their way is the best way for America.

I'm an outsider, an immigrant. Growing up, my country was under a socialist regime where healthcare is provided by the government, and education is at the top of the list. I find myself trying to dissect the messages both major political parties give and find the one that closely resembles my ideals. Neither do, there is no party that truly represents me, 100% of my convictions. There couldn't be; simply because I'm just one and the party represents the many.

Liberal, conservative. I'm not sure where I fall. I'm too liberal to be a conservative and too conservative to truly be a liberal. I vote on the ISSUES, not along party lines.

New month, new office

Time to start over. Hopefully I will do a better job at keeping this blog updated.

I have moved into our new office. If you drive on Amite Street, our building is in the first intersection, corner of Amite and President. They are still working on the outside, and once it's finished, it's going to look great. I'm adjusting to this change, but overall it has been great.

I've decided that rather than blogging about nothing, I will blog about things that have been on my mind. First up, fertility.

I was listening to Dave Ramsey on the way back from the field the other day. A woman had called to get his opinion about borrowing $20K to undergo fertility treatments. I didn't get to hear his advice on the subject, but it got me thinking. Would I be willing to spend that much money and undergo all that treatment to bring a kid into this world? Would you?

I always thought if I couldn't have kids the old fashioned way, I would adopt. So many children out there who need loving parents, why not be that parent?

The thing that struck me was this woman said "I need to have a baby". I never felt I "needed" to have a kid. I wanted children, but I didn't need them as one needs a drink of water, or new clothes, or a car. I wanted them.

Perhaps she was emotional and chose the wrong word, I don't know. I kept wondering if she "needed" this baby as one needs a new purse, as a possession and not as the amazing gift a new life represents.

I'm not doing a very good job with this blog lately. I don't have internet at home (I'm back in the dark ages), and work is insane these days. I know, excuses.

Valentine's day is coming. I wonder, do most people celebrate V-day? We really don't, it's just a Hallmark holiday for us. We are more of the "everyday is special" type people. We'll get a card for no reason at all, send I love you messages on the phone, etc.

Now that we have Candace, Valentine's day is more about her. Claude will get her a little gift and a card, so she'll have a special valentine from her dad. That means more to me than a box of chocolates.

I guess the same is true for birthdays, since I didn't even buy a cake for mine. ha. I guess I could always bake one of my favorites, Tres Leches Cake. It's a Latin recipe, you mix 3 different types of milk, and let the cake soak up all the liquid. sooo good.

The boys are growing and talking more. Their favorite word is NO. At least that one comes in handy now that I want to potty train them.
They are funny creatures, those two. They are definitely good friends, they hardly ever fight, and they enjoy each other's company. If one is crying, the other one will start talking to him, in their own jibberish language, as if trying to find out what is wrong. Too cute. I guess that's a bond those of us who are not twins cannot understand.

I cannot believe these 3 kids are mine. Watching Candace become a kid and no longer a baby it's a humbling experience. This amazing little girl grew up inside of me, and I brought her into this world.

And the mere fact I carried those 2 boys inside of me at the same time and for 34 wks continues to blow my mind.

God has blessed me in more ways than I deserve.

My 2009 marathon

Well, it’s not that kind of marathon. Although I went to the kickoff meeting for Marathon Makeover, I didn’t sign up for training this year. I was tempted but the next time I do it, I want to do give it all and that requires time I don’t have right now. I want to be one of the fast people and run with Mandy, Cindy, Carey, and Kim.

Instead of training for Chicago, this year I’m preparing for my own kind of marathon. My first trip to Panama in 10 years.

10 years. I can’t believe I have not been home in 10 years. Last time, my mom and I went together. We spent Christmas there. I have to admit, it was a stressful trip. Flight had a connection in Miami and the flight from there to Panama was overbooked so mom and I spent the night at the airport.
I rented a car while I was there (so I could take my grandparents on day trips) and someone stole a headlight from the car. It wouldn’t be a big deal, except the rental car agency (a local one) tried to charge me $200 for a headlight. Now, this was a Nissan and these cars are very popular in Panama, so they could easily find one at a reasonable price. I ended up getting pretty mad and having them call a manager because I knew they were trying to overcharge me for the light. I was ready to come back by the time the trip was over.

Aside from the normal travel inconveniences, it was a good trip. This was the last time I saw my cousin Jose. He died in August of 2000, he was just 33. It won’t be the same to go home and not see him. And Abuelo is no longer there. Some of you remember, he died in Feb 07, while I was training for Chicago. He won’t be there either.

I’m still excited to go home. Claude has never been out of the country, so this is my chance to show him where I came from. I get to share this part of me with him, and that means the world. I also get to share it with Candace, who has seen pictures and heard stories about this “familia” she has back home. I finally get to share this wonderful girl who calls me Mami with the rest of my family. And even though the twins are young and probably won’t remember this trip, I’m happy they’ll get to meet their family.

Traveling home takes a lot of planning, even when it’s just one person going. Imagine how much more work it is to travel with 3 kids! There is passports to get, bags to pack, where will we stay, do we need a rental car, itinerary to plan, etc.

But I’m excited. I think this will bring Candace and I closer together. She will have a rare opportunity to see how blessed she is. My family back home is not wealthy. They have very little when it comes to material possessions. I want her to see how lucky she is to have her own room, her own TV, her own toys. I had none of that growing up. I want her to appreciate how hard Claude and I work to provide a nice living for her and her brothers. I think at her age, she’ll be able to grasp and understand this.

I also think this glimpse into my past will help Claude understand better who I am. It is not that he doesn’t know me, but one thing is to hear someone tell about their life, and another to see exactly where they came from.

So I will be blogging more about travel plans as the months go by. I’d like to go sometime between mid May and mid July but we haven’t picked the exact days yet.